Should We Have an Open Bar? Worried about one particular guest...

Why don't you have beer, wine and a signature drink? Many people who are not big drinkers like to have one or two at a wedding. It loosens up conversation and inhibitions about dancing/socializing. Since you will decide what beer your having, he can't order the most expensive kind. It will just be what you provide.

We are doing a limited bar with a few beers wine and a couple of signature drinks that way the cost dose not get out of control I was worried about that to.

I am concerned with my mother. I am instructing my bartender to limit her to no more than 5 beers or two glasses of wine. I would suggest the same since its only one person you are concerned with. Or maybe say that part of making sure nobody gets wasted that there is a 4-5 drink limit.

Your bartenders should be vigilant about who is drinking too much because it it THEIR responsibility. Do a limited bar; I doubt that anyone, including him, will get out of control.

Honestly, you will have no control over people's behaviors at your wedding. All you can do is hope they have the decency and courtesy to act appropriately. I don't think you should let one person's behavior or actions help you decide something you may want at your wedding for everyone else.

Have the open bar. It's not fair for everyone to suffer because of ONE person. I know it's annoying but, cost-wise, his excessive drinking will be balanced out by the non-drinkers.

We are doing beer and wine only. FH whole family is from Wisconsin and they are heavy, heavy drinkers. Plus, all of our friends are 23-25 years old and not all of them how figured out they're not in college anymore... We can't control their behavior but it gave us peace of mind. Liquer drunk and beer drunk are two very seperate things in my opinion

Go with the open bar. Typically you choose what types of alcohol you provide to guests. You can what "shelf" (e.g. top shelf) liquor you want to serve which you can fit to your budget.

And Celia is right- it's the bartenders' job to cut off anyone who is intoxicated.

Hey Tabitha! Congrats on your upcoming wedding. I LOVE intimate weddings - you are going to be able to enjoy time with every guest at the party.

Here's what I'd tell any of my clients: Your wedding ceremony and reception should honor and reflect you and your future husband. If you would like to entertain your guests with a few adult beverages (I recommend a beer and wine bar - it's popular and great for the budget!), then you should absolutely do so. Your decisions do not need to revolve around any particular individual and his ability to conduct himself properly. Even at events where no alcohol is served, determined individuals will find ways to obtain it, either with pre-partying or with flasks. You cannot control any guest's behavior, and your only responsibility on your wedding day is to be a gorgeous, happy bride at your once-in-a-lifetime event!

Your family is most likely well aware of the issue and will assist with resolving an issue should one come up. Additionally, your venue's bartenders are legally responsible for safe alcohol service, and most venues require security (typically an off-duty police officer) to handle events that escalate.

Lovely bride, do not worry your pretty little head about this individual. Host a beer and wine bar, smile, and enjoy your engagement - it will go by so quickly!

If the majority of your guests don't drink and you're concerned about this one guest, I'd say don't have one! You'll also end up saving money that you can spend elsewhere.

A nice compromise would be to have wine with dinner and champagne for a toast, but no other alcohol. Or, you could do just a beer and wine bar.

Thank you everyone for your insight! It has been helpful

I know I cannot control everything that is going to happen during our wedding/reception...but if I am able to make things more "calm" I will surely try to make an attempt lol

I will go over the options with my FH tonight about having a semi-open bar...with our signature drink of choice (whatever that may be) and some specific types of alcohol that will be served.