Should parents chip in the same amount of money to our wedding as my sisters?

I think it's best to just ask them how much they can contribute. Let them decide if they want to/can afford to give the same amount as they did a few years ago.

You shouldn't request any specific amount. Your parents offered to help, and they'll let you know how much. I do think you can ask them what they are planning to contribute so you can start planning, but I wouldn't mention an amount.

Peoples finances changes, especially if they helped your sister a few years ago. Just take what they offer and be grateful!

I think it's not appropriate to ask for an amount. I'd tell your parents to think about it and give you the number.

I agree with pp. It's up to your parents on how much they contribute

Parents are not required to pay for your wedding so there is no "should." If they want to contribute then accept whatever they offer with appreciation. Most couples pay for their own wedding so consider yourself lucky that they are even willing to give you this gift. You can discuss with them the amount for planning purposes and if they intend to give it to you directly or pay specific vendors. But I would not request a certain amount.

As PPs said, let your parents decide how much they'd like to contribute! It's not really polite to ask for a certain amount

Just here to reiterate what was said previously. How much do they want to give you or what specific things do they want to cover. That's about the only way to ask.

Have a conversation with them. I would think they would tell you how much they're comfortable contributing.

To clarify: they said they’d chip in and asked me how much I need. So they want a number amount from me. So idk how much to ask for.

**saw your update about them asking for a number.. I would just say as much as they'd be comfortable with!

You don’t dictate how much they contribute. You should be appreciative of whatever they offer, even if it’s $20.

I think you should just use whatever they give you.

Ah wait I see your update now - I guess asking for the same amount does make sense. But I think I'd leave it to them to decide anyway

"Whatever you're comfortable with would be just great!" You can't tell them an amount. Your sister's wedding was different, the cost of living has risen, their finances may be different--

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In that case, to keep peace in the family, I'd suggest asking for the same percentage. The same amount for a smaller wedding might annoy your sister!

Something else to keep in mind, the more money your parents contribute, the more say they might want in what you do, such as who's invited, food etc. If you think that might be a problem, it's something to consider.

You can talk to your parents about your plans. So they know the scale and general idea. After that, they may offer a dollar amount, or to cover certain things, or tell you they have put all their available money into something they need or want, and give you their best wishes, and no money. It is not for you to ask an amount. You are entitled to none. When someone offers a gift, the amount is up to the giver. But if you have a plan, and some estimates for different venue's, types of meals, current costs for some vendors along with what that cost covers, or options, then they have all the information they need to choose what exactly they want to offer to you. Since they promised some unspecified amount, this is a good way to get them talking specifics. Many people inc parents can be very generous when it is their idea and offer, but get their backs up if anyone straight out asks for money. So put your possibilities out there in a concrete form, without asking. Good luck !

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I agree. You shouldn't request a specific amount. See what they are willing to contribute. It could be more or less than they gave your sister.

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Ask for how much you need then. Figure out how much your total wedding will cost. Subtract what you know you can contribute and tell them that number.

You shouldn't request any amount. You take what they give you, be happy with it then pay the rest yourselves.

Thanks everyone!
I talked to my mom tonight and told her more specific details and our estimate of the total cost. She asked how much my fiancé’s parents were chipping in and I told her, but said that she doesn’t need to match them or anything. Just to think it over and if she wants to chip in she can, or if since we are keeping costs low anyway she really doesn’t have to feel any obligation to help if she doesn’t want to. I told her to try not to compare it to my sister’s wedding and just come up with whatever plan works for her. She’s gonna think it over and let us know next week 👍🏻
Thanks again for your help! I felt really awkward trying to pick a number to tell her, and this plan works much better for both of us to feel better about the whole thing.