Should i even ask my bridesmaids what kind of dress they want to wear?

This is your decision for sure. It is considerate of you to acknowledge that everyone is different and will have different tastes, but if they want to support you as a BM on your wedding day, then they will have to suck it up and wear what you designate, though expect complaints from one or several. Or you could pick a color/fabric/designer/other detail and tell your BMs that they can choose their own dress, and even say you have to approve it before purchase, if that makes you feel better. There are online dress sites that allow you to choose dresses that you like and then they can choose whichever one they like best for themselves.

It’s for sure your choice but very nice of you to want them to be in something they’d like and be mindful of that

All my bridesmaids have different body types and I want them to feel comfortable. I chose long dresses because I know from personal experience that some people aren't always comfortable in short dresses, especially with an outside venue.

I don't think you have to ask your bridesmaids what they would like the best. I think as long as you don't make them all wear the exact same dress and it already sounds like you don't plan on doing that. At the end of the day, it is your day and you want your vision to shine through.

View Quoted Comment Oh that’s a good idea!

Since it's your wedding, you get to decide on whether you want them to all wear the same dress or whether you are OK with them all wearing different dresses. I wouldn't recommend leaving that decision up to your bridesmaids. Personally, I think it's easiest to let them pick out their own dresses in the specified color/length, especially since they all have different styles. Depending on how many people you have in your bridal party (and how opinionated they are), it can be a close-to-impossible task to get everyone to agree on one dress. If you want them all to wear the same dress, I suggest either you pick out the dress yourself, or give them 2-3 options and take a vote. Otherwise, it'll likely be a tough task to get them all to agree on one dress. If you're OK with them all wearing different dresses, websites like Azazie have plenty of dress styles, and you can specify the color/length/material.

View Quoted Comment I will check out Azazie! Thanks!

I mean yeah, common courtesy would be to ask the people wearing the dresses, what kind of dress they would be comfortable in.

In an effort to make finding a dress as easy as possible for my MOHs, I gave them length, color, and fabric, and told them to let me know what they liked for approval before ordering. It was a nightmare and I only have two ladies. They waited until the last possible second to order, one decided to get hers through a amazon instead of Azazie as previously agreed on and told me the color is “almost exactly the same” 🙄. I wish that I had just told them pick one of these five dresses in this color and order by this date. Trying to be accommodating can be totally stressful.

The Bride traditionally chooses what the bridesmaids will wear. There has been a growing trend to allow the bridesmaids to wear different dresses as more brides are acknowledging that one same dress might not suit numerous people.

I think it would be really lovely if you allowed the bridesmaids to wear different dresses as personally I can't stand the thought of wearing something that doesn't suit me! I did this with my bridesmaids and told them that they could choose any style so long as it was black, floor length, appropriate for a black tie event, and that the fabric was the same. Interestingly enough my bridesmaids picked the same dress.

I think if you go ahead with it, either give them some criteria to meet (as I did) or pick out a number of dresses and ask them to choose from the selection?

I had the same struggle! My sister has big boobs & 1 of my bridesmaids has had a double mastectomy. I want them to look & feel fabulous so I gave them the guild lines of color & length. Other than that I’m game for anything (within reason)! I don’t want anything too revealing or flashy. My tribe & I are going shopping in January for my April wedding.

You should definitely ask their opinions you’re putting them on display and considering you picked them to stand beside you on such a special day I assume you truly care about them so you should care about their feeling. Some styles just aren’t flattering for certain body types. Last thing you want is to put all of their flaws or insecurities on a pedestal

Take a look at Cocomelody which has a brick and mortar store plus a try at home option. Give them a color and let them pick the style. Because unless is the same height/weight/proportion, you're not going to easily get everyone to look good in the same dress.

Have you considered closet shopping? Being you go and see what your bridemaids already have? Do they all have a black dress for example that will work and you buy matching shawls or necklaces?




My bridesmaids were very different skin tones and one was average size and the other was plus size... One didn't have a lot of cleavage and the other was worried about the girls falling out... Budget was also an issue and they were very body conscious. The only thing they had in common is they were short. So the same dress was out of the question. They were also long distance so picking it out all together wasn't an option. I also gave environmental things they needed to consider like the venue is outside in winter and windy.

Black is complimentary on everyone regardless and practically the same everywhere. We tried closet shopping but neither had a dress at all. We're all tomboys but here's to trying. So, we went to Macy's and got them a nice little black dress they picked out. They picked the store. Black was easy to go into any store and find. Both were happy and comfy in the dress. I bought their dress because I wanted them there and like I said budget was an issue. We accessorized with a pink shawls and baby breath bouquet and shoes were whatever they wanted.

I think the trend of same color, different styles is fantastic! Every bridesmaid gets to wear what fits her body, and while they all look cohesive they don’t look too matchy-matchy (like weddings from the 90’s where bridesmaids wore the same dress, same hairstyle, same jewelry).


How do you like this look (but whatever color you want):

Assuming these are your nearest and dearest you’d want them to be comfortable at your wedding, right? Yes, let them have input on the dress. You can choose a color or color family, length, and fabric and let them choose what they will be most comfortable in within those parameters.

I would give them the option or at least ask what type of dress. No one wants to be “forced” to wear something that doesn’t look good on them

I would definitely ask them what they would feel comfortable in and if possible all go try dresses on together. One of the weddings I was in I was shocked to find a dress that fit my body type (plus size) and the other bridesmaids body type (stick thin). We would have never figured it out if we wouldn't have went and shopped together!

I chose the dress my girls wore. One wanted something s little more conservative, one didn’t want a open back/she needed to wear a bra. And I wanted long, elegant, with back details. We looked until we found one that fit all of our needs and we all liked (I liked) and that’s what they wore. I only had 2 bridesmaids but one lived out of state so she didn’t go shopping with us. We sent her pictures of the dresses.

Hit reply too soon. So ask your girls what they are and aren’t comfortable in. If there are any must haves for their dress and start from there.

I would pick the same color and fabric and let them choose between different styles that suit them best. David’s bridal or aZazie seem to be popular