Should i ask?

I would ask. Sure it’s not the best etiquette-wise, but neither is inviting someone to a wedding without their SO.

It’s ok to ask since it’s unclear. If only you’re invited, it’s totally ok to RSVP “no.”

View Quoted Comment I know that’s why I feel stuck lol. My original invite got lost in the mail so she rushed a new one out just 2 days ago so my dad thinks that’s why FH isn’t on it. I just know that if people ask me if they can bring people I’ll be annoyed. But at the same time I am inviting all SO’s so I don’t think that’ll be as much of an issue. And trying to find a way to word it politely is even harder!

"Hey i know this invite was sent in a hury just curious if it was ment for me and future hubby? "

Just ask. But if it is just meant for you, understand that it is probably due to their budget and not something personal against your fiancé. I think it’s much less annoying as a bride to have someone clarify than to infer that they can bring a plus one when in fact a plus one was not invited.

I had two guests that I didn’t know needed a +1.

One asked if she could bring her special guest. So, I told her that he might not be able to sit with her, but he could come. It turned out that I could sit him with her.

The other let me know that she had re-married. So, I added him too.

You have to just ask.

I also had two Cousins that were not on my list. However, they LET me know that they wanted to come instead of just showing up like two other Cousins. So, I added them.

As long as you ask nicely, and don't presume things, most people are fine. ' I am unsure if you meant to invite my fiancé Joe, or not.' . . . Clear and polite. We had all but a handful addressed when interrupted by a dog chase, a bird had flown in the open door. And later ??? From 3 of the five we finally settled down to write, showed we left off one child, one Grandmother, and one of FI's SIL. FI had addressed to principal person, forgot other, totally unintentionally. And we would have been so unhappy, and embarrassed, to have missed them and not had any inquiry. They were in our planned numbers. Most people invite spouses and fiancés. Ask.

I would just say something like “hey I just got your invitation! So exciting! It’s ok if (future husband) comes too right?”

Dont YOU worry about being rude with this, because either she’s going to respond “omg I’m so sorry, my bad, of course he’s invited!” ORRR she’s going to respond and tell you some explanation about how they don’t have the space or budget for you to bring him, and in that case SHE is the one being rude!

^ just a follow up on my post too, I actually am guilty of having done a similar thing, one of my friends had a boyfriend of a year at our wedding but at the time of invitations I hadn’t met him, and I like, knew she had a boyfriend, but in the chaos of writing the invitations I totally spaced on addressing it to both of them and just made it out to her. She texted me after receiving the invitation and asked if it was ok to bring her boyfriend and I felt SO BAD that I had left him off the invite and told her of course he was invited. It was just a bride-brain moment honestly 🤦🏻‍♀️ But I felt so bad putting her through the awkwardness of having to ask me lol.

Maybe your friend did something like that...? 🤷🏻‍♀️

I agree with the others. It would be rude on her part to not include your future husband, regardless of space or budget. Asking her politely is fine. As Gen and a few others said, it may have just been an accident. Just reach out and say "hey, I got your invite! Thank you so much for rushing it out! I noticed that future husband isn't on here and just wanted to clarify if the invitation is just for me or both of us."

I asked and he was invited! Thanks for the advice 😊

So I had been invited to a wedding that did the same. I assumed he wasn't invited. But my friend clarified and said he was

Similar thing happened to me. My second cousin got married several years ago. I had been with my FH for about a year and my brother had been with his now wife for about 2 years. Both of us got invites with only our names on them. Since we were second cousins and close with our cousins but they didn't know our SO's, we assumed they just weren't invited. Of course, my mom said she would call, but we said no. I went, my brother did not. My cousin actually asked where my FH was. I said oh, he wasn't on the invite so I assumed he wasn't invited. She said of course he was invited! Oh well, it was fine. Had that happened now or when we are married, I may have taken my mom up on her offer to call, but then I would always wonder if they felt obligated to say yes and then we would be talked about.

I would definitely just ask. Or ask someone else that might know, like a bridesmaid. It would be odd for your fiancee to not be invited, but who knows?! At the very least it should have been addressed to you and guest if they didn't know or didn't want to list his name. I would just ask to make sure.

I would ask, since usually it would be addressed as "and guest" or with your FHs name on the invite. you wouldn't want to just assume you could bring him if he's not accounted for.