Should alcohol be served if the groom is underage? What is the etiquette?

I'm not sure what "rockstar" has to do with my comment. As much as some people would like to think, no one has the perfect response that will make everyone happy! I'm trying to listen to the bride and give her suggestions for her situation.

Due to FH being underage and being sensitive to personal matters, I would go with just beer and wine, but when it runs out, it's out. You are providing free alcohol and no one complains when it's free, so no worries about serving the best of the best or liquor.

View Quoted Comment

Because rockstars are suppose to be knowledgeable posters who assist the community, and making a suggestion that is HIGHLY against etiquette reflects badly on that title

View Quoted Comment Ooh I like this idea a lot! Thank you 😊 it’s going to be a very casual setting so I was originally thinking byob would be good seeing as only a few guests actually drink but I think I’ll do a bit of each! Something like we will supply the following beverages, and if it’s not to your liking, bring your own!

I believe you should still serve alcohol. Underage guests and guest with dependencies attend weddings (and other functions) all the time without issues.

Make sure you have a professional bartender and you're good to go - they know to check for ID and they know when to cut people off.

View Quoted Comment Because I would think a “Rockstar” wouldn’t suggest something that is such poor etiquette.

Her situation is is that her groom is underage. Cash bar is not an appropriate suggestion.

View Quoted Comment

Actually no. "Rockstars" are members that uphold community guidelines, welcome new members, and contribute ideas. There is nothing about "rockstars" and traditional wedding etiquette. Just like I hope any adult would be in real life, I hope all people commenting can respect everyone's individual opinion and not feel it necessary to say rude comments.

Serve alcohol. Please.

View Quoted Comment Nothing I said was rude. And I know that technically “rockstars” don’t have to provide proper etiquette. I simply stated I was surprised that a “Rockstar” would suggest what you did.

View Quoted Comment

I didn't see any rude comments.

I must say though, I was also surprised to see a Rockstar suggest a cash bar. There are ways to limit the bar before going cash. Cash bars IMO (and the opinion of most people) are usually because the host did not budget properly and therefore cannot afford to properly host their guests. This is not the case in this situation so I'm not sure why you would suggest a cash bar in the first place...

OP, I think beer and wine only is a great compromise

View Quoted Comment

Thanks for your input!

View Quoted Comment

No problem! Our venue is letting us bring in all the alcohol (just us, no guests are allowed to bring their own in) and we're doing only beer and wine. We've decided to get 30 cases of beer (3 different types) and 30 bottles of wine (a white and a red) for about 250-300 people, so if and when it runs out, sorry!

View Quoted Comment Is your venue even somewhere that’s acceptable? Many wedding venues will not allow you to or your guests to bring in your own alcohol because it’s a liability.

I keep asking myself (and the mods) this question every day!!!! Would loooove to know the answer!!!

View Quoted Comment

Upholding the community, IMO IS making good and smart etiquette suggestions that will also benefit the guests and NOT jsut the bride and groom. It gets said throughout the forums a lot the reception is a thank you to the guests and so their comfort and enjoyment need to be taken into consideration. Nothing I said was rude either, you asked what being a rockstar had to do with it and I gave my opinion on the matter - which was that making good etiquette suggestions is a part of that.

also not sure why a cash bar is a solution for an underage groom? Just because he cannot drink does not mean the guests should be asked to open their wallets.

View Quoted Comment Not everyone can afford paying for an open bar or even a limited bar. It’s ok to offer a cash bar as long as people know ahead of time.

View Quoted Comment

This this this!

View Quoted Comment

That's not what OP's question was. this has nothing to do with her budget. but again, it's never ok to have a cash bar or to ask your guests to pay for anything. if you can't afford the alcohol, you've invited too many people.

Thank you everyone! I appreciate all of your opinions. I’ve posted a comment with what I think we will do. Supply a certain amount and then when it’s out it’s out!

View Quoted Comment

I miss the like button.