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Savvy January 2021

Separation from fiancé - coronavirus

Melanie, on March 20, 2020 at 4:11 PM Posted in Family and Relationships 0 8

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So a few months ago I moved back in with my parents to save money for the wedding and buying a house. My fiancé already lived with his parents because he moved back in after having surgery a few years ago. I used to see him everyday after work and he usually stayed at my place. So the last few months have been really rough on me being away from him. I usually spend the weekend at his place.

Fast forward to this past week and coronavirus. Yesterday my boss decided for me to start working at home. I told my fiancé this and he told me that since I am not in contact with anyone anymore he doesn’t want me to come over on weekends anymore until the coronavirus clears up. He’s works for a distributor and is in contact with several people on a daily basis and doesn’t want to risk passing something on to me or my family. I am devastated and told him so and asked him to reconsider. I know he’s doing it for the right reasons but I don’t know how long this will last. Any advice will be helpful.

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8 Comments

Latest activity by Rebecca, on March 21, 2020 at 4:12 AM

Master May 2019
Cyndy · on March 20, 2020 at 4:17 PM
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I’m sure this must be disappointing and sad for you, but I think he is thinking clearly given the current state of everything. Try do things like FaceTiming and calling more often to fill the void. I know it’s not the same but he doesn’t want to have you or your family get sick. This will end and you will get married and have a lifetime together. Good luck!
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Legend November 2019
Caytlyn · on March 20, 2020 at 4:18 PM
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He made the right decision and you should make sure that it lasts until things have cleared up. I work in a hospital and our physicians have already started to quarantine themselves from their spouses and children. My wife has bad asthma so we're contemplating our best option now. It's not easy, but if you were to contract the virus from him, you could be hospitalized with no visitors at all and I'm sure that your FH would feel extremely guilty.
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Devoted August 2020
Elle · on March 20, 2020 at 4:19 PM
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I'm sorry you are going through this. My fiance and I also live separately. I have my own apartment, and he lives with his mom, his sister, and his sister's kids. I am working from home until April 30th (my company issued a statement that ALL global offices are remote until April 30), but he is a truck driver and will be driving to places and see people on a daily basis. I told him that we probably should not see each other until this dies down. I know that's probably what you don't want to hear, but it is for the best at this time. We will probably give in and see each other, or maybe just see each other on a super limited basis, but for now, we are staying apart. Please hang in there!
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Super October 2021
Nicole · on March 20, 2020 at 4:35 PM
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That's so hard and I'm so sorry you're relationship is affected by the outbreak. Your fiance made the right choice. I would get creative about virtual dating. Play movies at the same time and then discuss them afterwards. Sit down over dinner and facetime so you can share meals together. What do you normally do together? Find a way to still enjoy that just over the phone
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Savvy September 2020
Belen · on March 20, 2020 at 8:26 PM
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I am in the same boat. My FH job is essential and requires interacting with many people. I still live with my parents and we decided to self quarantine due to my brother being high risk if he contracts the virus (he is a cancer patient). So it is emotionally tough, but considering the risk of how contagious the virus is we rather not risk anything. We have been facetiming everyday to try to cope. Stay strong!
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Dedicated June 2021
Ally · on March 20, 2020 at 8:45 PM
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I agree with the others. This must be extremely hard for you and I’m so sorry this has to separate you two, but it is for the best. I’m a student in a lab at a hospital, and if I was required to stay in my rotation, I was going to quarantine myself from my FH as he has asthma and I worry about him getting this. Thankfully, (and unfortunate at the same time) they have suspended my rotation as soon as we got the first case in my state so I didn’t have to make that choice and we have been doing the social distance thing since. You can FaceTime/Skype/call on the daily to keep in touch. I know it’s not the same and it’s unfortunate, but this will pass. Keep your head up!
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Master 0000
Judith · on March 20, 2020 at 9:39 PM
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Loving someone is doing what is best for them, though it may not be what Immediately makes either of you happy. You want a future together. He loves you. And is willing to do the hard think, to protect you, and your future together, and the family you love. Look at a picture of him and think of how very much he cares. Lucky you .
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Master August 2019
Rebecca · on March 21, 2020 at 4:12 AM
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This is awful and I'm sorry.
However, I think he's right. He's really doing this to protect you and your family, even if it hurts like heck to do it. This says a LOT about him, and those are good things.
DH has made noises about me leaving if he gets it (...I pointed out I don't have anywhere to GO...), because I have a history of pneumonia. Today was the first day he didn't have to go to work, and I'm counting this as the start of our isolation.
This virus is absolutely vicious, and if your FH is in contact with ANYONE, he could very easily pick it up. Video calls are a lifeline, so make a lot of use of them.
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