Sending RSVP cards with the save the date's???

Defiantly weird, I have NEVER heard of anyone doing this. Your guests would be SUPER confused.. i think you should stick with your plan and not do it. Some of guests were even confused about my STD.. some thought it was actually an invite and all it was was a square card saying the date *doh*

Yeah, I think you should just do it YOUR way.

This doesn't make any sense to me because even if you send someone a save the date and they tell you they can't make it, you should still send them an invite. It would be rude not to. Plus, about the "and guest" part, what if cousin John gets a new girlfriend and you just addressed his invite to his ex? Stick to your guns!!

Weird. we all wish we could get a better head count sooner, but i don't think it's appropriate.

Jeez, just send the invites with rsvps and call it a day.

I've never heard of that before. I agree..you should do it the way you want.

Okay so I didn't miss out on some weird wedding trend! Thank you all, you have set my mind at ease and I still stick to my guns and do it MY WAY!

Yup. Strange. An STD is just that. Why do you need to know who can't make it before you send out the invitations? I know of a few who told me they can't go, but I'm sending them the invite in case their plans get changed because I would love to have them there.

We went to a wedding show today and I asked one of then Invitation vendors. She thought it was crazy sauce. FH on the other hand thinks the lady who told us to do it is right! GRRR Regardless I think it is dumb and I don't want to do it that way.

I never heard of that. The thing that worries me is how accurate the RSVP's will really be. People will definitely say yes or no and then change their mind closer to the date of your wedding. A lot can happen in a 10 month time span...

So I went right to the source and it turns out it was FH who misunderstood what she said. She simply meant we can do a traditional or postcard style RSVP card. Not actually intending to send them before the invite. She too agreed that would not workout!!

Well, at least now you can feel confident in knowing that she knows what she's doing. At least your FH is involved. I bet my FH doesn't even remember what our STDs look like (I just finished addressing them today)

Very bad etiquette, from my understanding. Like Shannon A says, we'd all like to know ahead of time what the guest list will actually be, but in my opinion, an RSVP with a save the date is just plain tacky.

I feel bad now bc it was a suggestion for me to send the RSVP with the STD. My guest list is around 360 and we are trying to figure out certain things now rather than waiting util invites are sent out. Im far from tacky, super far from it but I feel this this would give me a better understanding as to were to put our money for certain things. You send out invites and people still don't show, same with saying blah blah to the rsvp but I think I'm just feeling bad bc when I say how big my list is, I feel like people are like "WHAT....THATS TOO MANY PEOPLE" I have a extremely large family and we are very close. I googled the suggestion to see how others feel, but in the end it will be me. Like I said I'm far from tacky but something about it makes me feel bad, like myself telling me no don't do it.....but what could it hurt? I never been one to give two cents about what people would think or say bc for one...we are party for them to basically come to our HUGE PARTY...Please don't read into my words as anything neg.... I'm just stuck:-(

I think it's not a good idea to send Save The Dates and Invitations with RSVPs at the same time. I feel like guests are going to be confused. both types of stationaries are important. I feel like the Save The Dates are sent out early enough to let people know and aware that there is a potential wedding in their future they might attend. You want people to give enough time to try to take off work or mark it on their calendars.

Then when you send the invitations with RSVP cards, you send them 6-8 weeks out so that you it's enough time for people to receive them and respond in a timely manner but also less likely for people to forget.