Sending invites too early? November Bride

That's a pretty standard timeline for destination weddings, maybe a little early, but not extreme.

I feel like having guests RSVP two months before the wedding is early but if that's what you have to do, do it.

View Quoted Comment Send them out like early-mid July? That was my original plan but I don’t want to be rude/send them out too early lol

View Quoted Comment Yes it’s super early! But I’m a planner & don’t want to worry about anything as the day gets closer 🤷🏻‍♀️

View Quoted Comment That's not going to be possible. There will always be things to worry about. I'm getting married on Friday and more things have come up in the last 2 to 3 weeks than the past 10 months. It's not due to a lack of planning either. We set our RSVP date one month before our wedding date and we had one couple in that time change their RSVP. You might find that happening in your case too. Everyone has hiccups in the RSVP process anyway. Hope it works out for you!

I’m having an out of state wedding in November and I’m sending mine in August but rsvp is October. Just leaving enough room for transportation and catering numbers.

View Quoted Comment I know nothing will be perfect, but I will remain positive. Thank you 😊

Personally, I think that's really early. Unfortunately, just because a bride likes to be super organized and lock down numbers far in advance does NOT mean the guests are going to cooperate. Because your wedding is kind of a destination wedding for a lot of your guests, sending STD 6-8 months prior would have been a great idea (if you didn't already do that), so people could think about their travel arrangements, etc. If you didn't send them, you can still reach out to guests (by phone, email, text, whatever) and give them the hotel info and/or your wedding website, so they can begin planning. Most wedding vendors will work with an estimate to give you an idea/range for your costs, and then need the final guarantee a couple weeks before the wedding. Even if you think you have your final numbers by Sept. 5, and give those to your vendors, there is a good chance people who originally said no may change their minds and want to come, and others who said yes may back out and/or no-show. The conventional guideline is sending the invitations 6-8 weeks prior to the wedding; for a destination, maybe 8-10. Depending on your date in November, I wouldn't send them more than 10 weeks and set your RSVP date for 1-2 weeks before your FINAL numbers are due to the vendors. There are a million posts on this forum from brides who sent their invites out really early, only to have people ignore them, and then they had to follow up on even more RSVP's than they might have with a shorter timeline. Clearly, you can do whatever you want, but realize others may not cooperate with your plan. Good luck!

I sent mine out a bit earlier than normal. And then often times we will be asked by people the details because they forget since they RSVPd a while ago. So it you plan to do that, be prepared to send out reminders closer to the date.

I don’t think it is early hotel blocks have to know a month ahead of time. The. Girls say to send invite a month ahead of time. Which make less Len zero sense it your hotel block needs to know at the time you are sending out invites.

View Quoted Comment She is getting married November 5 so early August is 8 weeks before the wedding.

View Quoted Comment Sorry more then that

View Quoted Comment

I agree it's important to let people know about a hotel block (often via an STD and/or the wedding website), but the expiration date of the hotel block is often very early (and not all guests are going to even consider using the hotel block anyway, so there may be a fair amount of guests this has no impact on) so the block date doesn't really have to have anything to do with the RSVP date. Like I said, a couple can set whatever dates they want, but there are going to be pros and cons.

View Quoted Comment This! I also think it’s a little early, some people may not know until 6 weeks before the wedding. September seems a little early.

Half of my guests are OOT and for our 8/8/19 wedding we asked for RSVPs by 7/15/19

View Quoted Comment I think all of this is exactly right. For those who need advance notice, use email, a phone call, a postcard or letter, or a Save the date. I think phone calls are best, because I and many others I know got definite, "I have my sister's wedding that weekend" type declines. No need to save a space or send an invitation.
Invitations should not be used early, for early notice. You will get fewer RSVPs the longer it is between receiving them and the wedding date. And false positives and false negatives. In that 4 months, a family member may set a date 2-3 months away, or a friend with a short engagement will ask them to be in a wedding party. And as you did not follow the rules of sending the invitations to arrive at guest homes at 6-8 weeks, max 10, when people can make an informed decision based on knowing about all invitations for the time period, and receiving work time off approval, ----
then you cannot expect them to stick with the answer you gave them, and turn down any invitations they receive after your super early one. ... Etiquette is a reciprocal thing, a two way street, like a contract. If you want people to give you an answer and stick to it, you must send them at the proper time. If you break that and ask for answers before they can possibly answer for sure, you get a guess that they may properly reverse at any time. It really is harder near wedding time to have 20 people you counted on as acceptances, decline at 4-5 weeks, when they finally find out about other obligations, work schedules, illnesses they will need to get treatment for, or pregnancies. Better to send them at the appropriate time to begin with.
Do what you want. But no one wants to see a bride fall into this trap of early invitations, when giving early notice by phone or email, and invitations closer to the wedding, will get more RSVP, and fewer reversals of early decisions.

I totally feel you about being a planner and wanting to be organized. I’m the exact same way. I just like to get things done! But there are certain things you shouldn’t rush.

About 75% of my guests will be traveling 500-1000+ miles for my wedding, but I sent out save-the-dates so everyone could plan accordingly. If you did this, you should be fine with the standard timeline.

I’m getting married Oct 12. My invites are going out Aug 12 with an RSVP date of Sept 13. I did, however, start assembling and addressing all of the invitations yesterday. This way, they’ll all be done way ahead of time and it satisfies my need to be organized. Maybe just having them ready to go out would make you feel better too.

I'm a November bride as well and plan to send my invites out by the end of this month with an RSVP deadline of mid August. At least half our guest list is out of state, so I want to give them plenty of time to get the info they need to make travel plans, as well as give myself plenty of time to follow up with anyone who doesn't respond by the deadline. That may seem early to some, but having things finalized aioner than later makes things much less stressful for me and gives some leeway in case I need to make any changes.

RSVP deadline needs to be a month prior to the wedding daye... at the latest. I’m sending my invites late June/early July for an Aug 31st wedding. Have you considered save the dates? I sent mine out in Feb-March so out of towners can keep the date in mind and know a formal invitation will be sent.

I'm sending mine early! You do whatever you feel is best!

I’m sending mine out mid-late June and my wedding is mid October. Literally all of our guests are traveling from out of town (FH family is from PA, mine if from CT & CA, with our wedding in MD). I think people appreciate the earlier invites so they can take time off work to travel and make hotel reservations. I also make a Facebook event as a virtual save the date, so I have a round a bout number of possible guests already!