Seeking Advice: After-party Planning for a Destination Wedding Etiquette

First thoughts are that pre-wedding parties are for people who are invited to the wedding. So showers etc would be with the people invited to the actual wedding abroad. You shouldn't be hosting our own shower anyway, so if someone offers you can have that conversation.

Having said that, if people are travelling to support your wedding abroad are you going to be hosting something after like a dinner? You said there wouldn't be a reception, so I'm just clarifying.

The afterparty can be controversial here and probably with your guests. To some people it may feel like a consolation for not being invited to the actual wedding. Other people don't see a problem with it.

Thank you so much for your response!

Yes, bridal shower would be hosted by a close friend but out of respect for family I want to be able to give guild lines on the etiquette in order to not offend anyone.

We are doing a formal dinner after the ceremony, just not a reception.

The after party isn't about people who aren't invited to the wedding, but more about family and friends who aren't able to come to the ceremony abroad because of financial and health issues. We've discussed with these people that this is what we want to do and I think everyone seems to understand what we're doing and our reasons for doing so. Totally understand the controversy surrounding the after party following the destination wedding, but we're trying to keep it from becoming an issue. We just want to be able to celebrate with people who aren't able to travel with us because they're important to us.