Second marriage

I was previously married for 15 years and have a daughter that has her dad's last name. When we divorced, I did not resume my maiden name. I absolutely changed my name. It would be very disrespectful (IMO) to keep my ex-husband's last name after marrying DH.

Just because I changed my name, it doesn't mean my daughter would have to. She still has her dad's last name. It is a non-issue.

Lindsey, I was being facetious to make a point. I don't even know you. There have been many hateful posts but when someone pointed it out people slammed that poor girl. Very distasteful.

Not much more distasteful than calling everyone on this forum names.

Thanks ladies, I kept my married name so my daughter would have the same name. She's an only child and 4 when I divorced. I feel like im abandoning her in some way. I guess that sounds crazy. Lol

I'm sad Lindsey's post was hidden

Should I make an entire thread to whine about it?

Hmmm, I've addressed that.

Talk to her and see how she feels. Make a mommy daughter special day of it. She may not mind. My mom remarried when I was in 2nd grade and my sister was in kindergarten and I didn't feel abandoned when she changed her name because she took the time to explain that name does not make family. She used grandma and great grandma as an example and her unmarried siblings. Showing me that even with different last names we are all still family and always will be.

I have a 7 year old from my previous marriage and I wanted no ties to her father so I changed back to my maiden name. I will change my name this time. My daughter understands and has actually asked if her last name will change too. Her soon to be stepdad is more of a father than her dad is.

My Mom remarried when I was 3 but kept my Dads last name for professional reasons. I liked that we had the same last name. When she got divorced and married again when I was 14 she changed her name. I was older so it didn't bother me as much. I'll be taking FH name because it's important to me that his kids and I have the same name. In know it's just a name but it makes me feel closer to them.

I was married for over 20 years. Divorced and kept my name because of the 4 kids. Now I am getting married, changing my name, and am very happy. It is a big heartfelt choice to make that comes from the heart not because she has to but because she wants to.

Elphaba, I've seen your BAM post. How in the world do you have a 23 year old child? I would have put you at about 26 or 27.

I was married for 16 years and had 2 kids. I went back to my maiden name and my kids did not mind. I will change it again when I get married to fh. Not looking forward to all that goes along with changing it though

I was married for 20 years and kept my married name for my kids. Now they'll be adults and I feel better changing my name.

I was married before and have 2 kids. They both have their dads last name. I went back to my madian name due to his family and there drama. But my kids were fine with it. And they will stay with their dads last name when I get married.

@Rachel, I was thinking the same exact thing! @Elphaba, you're stunning and I wouldn't have thought you were old enough to have a 23 year old daughter.

I'm getting remarried, and I have a 5 year old from my first marriage. She has her father's last name and I currently still have the same name as her.

I'm about 90% sure I'm changing my name to my FH's. I don't think it's disrespectful not to though, as essentially it's my name and my choice on how to proceed.

I was married once before. I have 4 children from my first married ages 8, 10, 11, and 16.

I hyphenated my last name when I married my ex husband. When we divorced I opted to keep my name hyphenated. When FH and get married next month then I'll take his name and drop both of my other last names. I had a hyphenated last name for 15yrs, it was a pain in the ass.

I was married for 11 years previously and have 4 children. 2 boys (twins) and 2 girls. Their current ages are 15, 11, & 9. I had an open discussion with my kids about this. It was unanimous. While the girls understand that they will change their names when they marry the boys will not (most likely). All of my children still want to have that extra connection with them by sharing their last name. I talked to my FH about it. While I will be taking on his last name, I will also retain the name I have now for my children. He was fine with it.

I agree with your choice

I was married before and went back to my maiden name and my children maintained the last name they were born with which was my married name. It is hardly ever an issue, the only time I take any documentation (birth certificate) is when we go on cruises so I have proof I am their mother in case the cruise line asks for the documentation. My ex and I also have travel forms we found online that we both fill out for the other when we take the kids out of the country. When I remarry next year I will take on FH's name and will then need to bring my marriage certificate as well as their birth certificates and passports when we travel with the kids outside of the country.