Seating

I was at one last sept. It was good! Have them set up a few extra tables.

My sister didn't do a seating chart and I'm not doing one for my wedding either. It worked out great. There were no complaints or issues, everyone had a seat, and it saved both of us a lot of stress trying to figure out who to put where

Yes and I ended up sitting by myself because the few people I knew scattered. Some of the bride’s family got stuck in a corner. I really think it’s better to assign tables.

My cousins wedding was May 2018 and there was no seating charge, but hers was extremely small so family sat with family and friends sat with friends. My brother's wedding of about 100 people was in November of 2019 and they didn't assign seats. Everything was still perfect and smooth-transitioning. Guests met new faces and mingled upon one another. My wedding is in January and I'm sure as heck not assigning seats. I feel like it's more of a hassle and just something else to spend money on for signs, place cards, etc. I'd prefer my guests to feel comfortable and chose where they get to sit, but I also understand that the intent of a seating chart is to keep things organized and equal. I think you should do whatever you feel most comfortable doing. Good luck ❤️

I have been to 2 of them. Unfortunately, both times it was sort of a mess. People didn’t fill in the entire table, they would leave seats in between them, which caused families and friends to be separated from each other. Lots of asking people if they could switch seats or move down a seat. It reminded me of being in a crowded movie theater and people leaving random open seats so you can’t sit next to the people you’re with. I always thought assigned seating at weddings was silly or micromanage-y.... but once I saw how chaotic it can be when you don’t have it, I definitely changed my mind!

It can work, but it is better to assign someone to a table. It will save you money on centerpieces and chair and table rentals because you will need a few extra whole tables if you do open seating.

We were at one last October and it worked out fine, except that some people decided to take the tables closest to the head table usually reserved for immediate family. They also had several extra tables because people don’t necessarily group up to fill every table. People were really only seated while eating, so it was fine. At our wedding we have to assign seats because of the health department restrictions at our venue, and since we’re grouping by household/social circle it’s just easier for us. Our tables have anywhere from 4 to 8 people at them depending.

I am a super awkward person socially when I dont really know a bunch of people. To be honest, I absolutely do not like when seats are not assigned, it makes me so uncomfortable. I could not imagine the few people I know at an event sitting at an already full table and then I'd have to find another table of people I dont know to awkwardly spend my time with or sit at a table by myself. Reminds me of school lunch all over again.

The only times I’ve been at a wedding where it’s worked is when there’s a lot more tables than people. When there’s not I’ve been split up from my friends or I’m having to grab a chair from a different table.

I went to a wedding a few years ago without assigned seating. I did not enjoy it because I ended up having to sit alone since my fiance was still at work and the couples close family and friends crammed into a few tables. The other people I did know where 1. the Bride & Groom, 2. a Groomsman 3. the Groomsman's wife who had to leave to go pick up her kids.

I have never been to a setup like this that was not a chaotic nightmare. Say there are 10 guests to a table and 100 guests. Couples and families always get split up. People save seats for folks who don't sit with them unless they arrive first to stake their claim. Chairs get moved so you have 15+ at a 10 person table. You always have at least one person sitting alone the entire time for the above reasons. Or have more tables and chairs than you have guests to accommodate this.


It's much easier on you and them to assign tables (let them pick the seat) which is for the duration of dinner only and they are free to go where they please after.

I went to one with no seating chart a few years ago and it was a mess. I was luckily sitting at the head table but people were arguing about where they wanted to sit, especially because the couple’s closest family was outside getting in line to be introduced and the other guests took all of the closer tables, so they got stuck in the back. But it all depends on your guests, some will be courteous enough to not cause issues. I’d at least reserve tables for close family/bridal party if you want them closer to you.

The last wedding I went to had open seating and it went perfectly fine. It's almost like everyone already knew where they wanted to sit and who they wanted to sit next to. It just really depends on your guests. I feel, for FH and I, it would easier for us to assign tables.

For the stress level of your guests, please at least assign tables. I’ve been to weddings without assigned tables and it’s like picking a table at lunch in elementary school...the worst lol.

I’ve only been to 1 wedding that had assigned seating and I thought that was the weirdest thing ever. It didn’t help that I only knew about 5 people at the wedding (bride was a college friend). I love the laid back feel of no seating chart. We sit and float and chat with all friends and family.

The issue with not assigning tables is that you can easily run out of tables. People won’t be inclined to separate from those they know and you will likely have tables that get taken over but don’t get full enough. For example, you can end up with empty random seats and then need a table for a family with kids that can’t separate. It can also create conflict and stress. Parents may not get to sit close to the couple, families can end up scattered, etc.
For a smaller wedding and/or one where everyone mostly knows everyone, it could be fine, but it’s generally not the best idea. Wedding planner Jamie Wolfer has a great video about this (and mentions it in several others).

I personally wouldn’t risk it. With our families, a seating chart (so assigned tables but not chairs) is an absolute must.

I went to one a few years ago that was much more casual where there was no seating arrangement. It didn't seem to be an issue. If there's only a certain number of tables, only that many people can sit there so it shouldn't be an issue. It's nice for your guests to get to sit wherever they want.

In my experience, it always works out better to assign tables. You can leave seats up to the people, but really not assigning tables leads to chaos. It becomes like a cafeteria instead of a planned formal event. Some will be alone, some will be with strangers, some families will separate because they're later coming in and there aren't enough seats left for their whole family together. There're just a lot of issues that can come up.