Seating chart

Yes! Open seating is awful and very disorganized. Guests don't know how to properly seat themselves so you could end with way too many people at one table and other tables with only like two people.

Do the assigned seating! You won’t regret it, and your guests will appreciate it! We recently attended a wedding that had no assigned seating and it was AWFUL! Families and friend groups got split up. People ended up at tables with complete strangers (lots of unhappy faces and uncomfortable silences!).

Agree that although it can be a bit stressful, it’s best if it’s done. Guests appreciate it and it prevents the awful “school cafeteria PTSD” you would likely get from open seating:
A large group flocking to one table because they want to be with the “cool” guest. A table with two lonely guests that don’t know anyone else. Aunt Susan getting angry because the tables filled up and she didn’t get to sit next to her daughter Anne. Cousin Joey getting forced to sit with the uncle you know he likes the least. Other circles or groups getting reluctantly broken up, etc, etc.

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You have a point! Thank you!

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WOW! I never thought about it that way. Definitely doing the seating chart just have to put a lot of thought into it.

View Quoted Comment Would you be able to ask your future spouse or maybe even your in-laws to write up the table groupings for their side so half(ish) of the stress is off your shoulders?


I was a bit taken aback when MIL suddenly did that and shot it over in an email without even talking to me or FH first, but a second later I was super grateful that we didn’t have to deal with figuring out his side. She let me have total autonomy on which tables in the room to place those groups at, so even better haha.

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That is a really GREAT idea! That was going to be my next question on what would be the best way to do a seating chart or groupings? but you really helped me out! Thank you!

View Quoted Comment What I did was write every guest/couple on index cards, and then I grouped them based on who they knew. Some of those then filled a table on their own. For the others, I then thought about which groups would get along well (similar age range or interests or whatever). I had MIL help with some of their relatives and family friends.

Seating chart one million bajillion percent. It's SO much easier for guests. Just assign people to tables and make "escort cards" (i hand wrote mine, it's not a big deal), arrange them in alphabetical order on a table at the front of your reception, the people know what table to go to and have a home base for their purses, coats, shoes, drinks, etc.

If you don't do this you'll need minimum 10% extra chairs and tables bc ppl will sit in groups that they want, even if it's not a full table of 8 or whatever. ppl will move chairs around, it's just annoying honestly.

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This is basically what i did, except in an excel spreadsheet instead of index cards!

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That's another great way of grouping friends and family! I have some of the tables done but some are coming out uneven. Our coordinator suggested 10 per table but I'm either getting 7 or 9 in a table. So have to go back to the drawing board!

View Quoted Comment People don’t neatly organize themselves in groups of 10. We had a similar range, and it was fine. With all the table settings, less people actually gives everyone some elbow room, so I wouldn’t worry about it.

View Quoted Comment If they’re standard 60 inch rounds, 8 will be more comfortable. We used this number to form ideal groups, and then if it absolutely made more sense to put one or two more at a table that already had 8 based on relationship or getting along well, we allowed ourselves to go up to 10 max for a few of them because it could technically still fit that many (with slight loss of elbow room as Hannah noted).

Never seen this work. Have been to many weddings and dinner parties with open seating and usually it’s a disaster. The rare times when it does work is when there are twice as many tables and chairs as needed in a normal setting. If you don’t, grandma will save a table for guests who never sit with her and she won’t give them up for anyone, while others will try to cram 12 chairs at a table for 6.


Go on Etsy and get blank card stock tent cards (with 10 or so extra cards for typos and last second moves) and write guests’ names on the front with table assignment inside. If the caterer requires a color code for plated meal choices, pick 3 or so colors with one for beef, one for chicken and one for vegetarian. That is easier for the waiters to see from a distance than tiny stamps and stickers.

View Quoted Comment Thank you Michelle for your advice! I will try that out!