Seating Arrangements Troubles

I started playing around with mine...I split up SOME immediate families but sat them with people they knew and got along with really well.

My parents are divorced and have an, at times, strained relationship, so I split them up...with FILs having a table between them...its definitely made the seating chart a bit easier

Not all tables are going to be even unless you are a seating chart master. I found a template on google sheets that made it so easy to place people and move them around. I have everywhere from 7-10 guests at a table right now..

Have one table for your parents and a few aunts/uncles, one table for FIL's and a few aunts/uncles. Do the closest in age or something like that if you can't decide which ones. Just put the rest of the aunts/uncles at a nearby table.

I'm not looking forward to this part at all! I started playing around with mine and some of my tables will have 7 people instead of 8 because of the family size. I would just ask your parents who they want at their table. Hopefully it will become easier once you get all the RSVPs in.

Actually those a really good ideas...thanks everyone!

So it would be okay to split up his Aunts/Uncles from their Adult Children?? I wasn't sure if that was an etiquette no-no or what. If that's okay then it would help me out tremendously!

I never thought of splitting up FIL and my parents - but that might have to be what happens. Thanks again!

My aunts & uncles aren't sitting with their adult children. And we have separate tables for my family and FH's family. I don't think there is any "etiquette" on where to sit people, as long as you don't put 2 people that hate each other with each other lol.

@Karebare....I definitely would. FH and I have gone to more weddings on his side recently than mine so thats all that I can remember, but we were always sat with FSILs, FHBILs, and some of FH's cousins. Never his parents.

I will try not to sit guests with their adult children...the way I figure it is that chances are they see each other quite often and its not a big deal... but everyone will be sat with people they know and have a good time with.

Ha, I'm DEFINITELY splitting up the FILs from my parents. Not even a question.

These are the tables that I have on our spreadsheet -

Close Family

Extended Family

Family Friends

Siblings

Friends

Coworkers

FH's Family

FH's Extended Family

FH's Church Friends

FH's Church Friends

East Texas Family

Kids

I won't lie, as an adult, I would still rather be sat with my parents at a wedding than with my extended family and forced to mingle with them al through dinner.

That being said, you don't HAVE to have 8 people at every table. I had plenty of tables with 8 or 10. Or I got the larger sized tables and had one big table with 12.

I understand about you wanting to start your seating chart early. DH and I started our seating chart right after we decided on our venue (after hearing that the seating chart was one of the hardest tasks to get taken care of). In addition to both mothers having a larger family, both sets of parents are divorced. We had a table for each parent and their siblings. Both fathers' siblings couldn't attend so I sat my extended family with my father (even though none of his family was there he does spend time with many of my cousins so he was okay with sitting with them). For FIL, his mother was able to attend so we had 3 at that table already and just added 2 older couples DH thought would best fit with his father. We also had mostly 8 people tables but added 2 12 person tables to accommodate our bridal party members and their dates). We also changed tables a couple of different times based on our RSVP numbers.

You'd be surprised at how quickly you can hammer it out when you need to. I tried to seat families together and in cases where I had to split people up, I made sure each couple knew another couple at each table. People get over it. I didn't hear a single complaint.

I have really never been happy where I have been sat at other peoples weddings, so I am kinda dreading making a chart for my wedding. Just clear the final chart with all sets of parents to be sure they are happy with who they are sitting with. Not everyone is going to be happy with where they are...but oh well.

Its not like your guests are stuck where you put them. They are free to move around and such. I have never sat in one place at every wedding I have been to, except for dinner.

Chelsea, why were you unhappy with where you sat?

I don't really understand why people get upset about that. It's for dinner and that's pretty much it lol.

^ I'm interested as well.

For the few that I was talking about, they were not family weddings. So me and FH sat at the "friend" table. We didn't know anyone, so it was weird. For family weddings, I agree with Heather, Which i guess is not the norm.

I've been to a wedding where I didn't know anyone except the groom (co-worker) but I didn't mind, because we made friends with the people at the table, luckily FH is outgoing... lol

I'm mostly concerned about FMIL's family whining about certain people being split up, but like everone's said, it's just for dinner so I don't see why it should be a problem (but I'm sure it will!) There will always be someone who's unhappy - but I will never be able to make everyone happy so might as well not GAF

But I'm liking the idea of having the Aun'ts/Uncles closest in age sit with FIL's...Makes life way easier and doesn't make it look like we're 'favouring' anyone (yes that WOULD get brough up) at least we have some type of formula. All of my Aunts/Uncle's fit at one table (thank god for small familys!)

Again, I don't understand the problem with not knowing people for the hour it takes to eat dinner. You have a subject in common [the bride or groom], so.....is it really all that bad to come up with small talk for an hour with people? I guess I think that's putting too much responsibility on the bride and groom for something that isn't that big of a deal. It would be one thing if you were parked in a seat with a big column in front of it, couldn't see or hear anything, or the wait staff never got to you. But not knowing people? that doesn't seem like a big deal.

@janeen totally agree!