C
Dedicated June 2020

Scared no one will rsvp

Courtney, on February 11, 2020 at 7:05 PM Posted in Etiquette and Advice 0 9
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This is a big fear of mine... I sent out invitations the first week of February and I know invitations have been received. I included a RSVP postcard and a stamp with it. My wedding is April 18th. RSVP is March 11th. Everything has to be paid by March 18th. I am meeting with venue coordinator on March 12th.



I hand delivered some invitations to the people that go to my church as it is really small. I'm not sure if I followed "proper etiquette" but I told them to please let me know if they will attend as we need a final count for a caterer. This one older man said well you never know people always have stuff come up at the last minute 馃 ok yes I know that but if you think you are planning on coming please let me know.
So I guess my question is that if the RSVP date is coming closer and I'm not receiving RSVP's is it acceptable to call and reach out to the guests I've invited? Right now, we have 127 and was planning food for 130 people.

9 Comments

  • MOB So Cal
    January 2019
    MOB So Cal
    • Flag

    It's completely reasonable to follow up AFTER the RSVP date with anyone who didn't RSVP. But, if you do it before the date, you're just nagging.... By choosing a date, you set that as the acceptable time to respond. Also, realize that some people see the RSVP date as the day they should put their response in the mail.... (I know that sounds crazy.) Daughter sent her invitations exactly 8 weeks before the wedding. By the RSVP date (Christmas day) she'd heard from all but 10 guests, representing 3 households; however, probably 30% or more of the responses came in right before the due date (including from close family and members of the wedding party who CLEARLY knew they were attending...). Hang in!

    • Reply
  • Kathryn
    Rockstar August 2020
    Kathryn
    • Flag
    I expected a bunch as soon as our invitations went out, but it's been more piecemeal. Which is understandable - a lot of people don't know about April this far out. But we have been getting a bunch, and we know what to estimate for. I did bug parents on both side so they could get verbal confirmation from people, and that may seem like nagging but we're planning with the caterer! At least we can get an idea of how many are interested in making the trip.
    • Reply
  • Alycia
    Devoted April 2020
    Alycia
    • Flag
    I'm worried too we sent ours over a month and we have 15days left and half are missing
    • Reply
  • Ester
    Dedicated August 2020
    Ester
    • Flag

    I'm sending mine out today and super nervous on how things will turn out.

    • Reply
  • Sherry
    Rockstar September 2019
    Sherry
    • Flag

    Once your deadline has passed, I would start reaching out but I wouldn't until then. It is inevitable that you will have to chase some people down but don't be surprised if you get a flood of them right before the deadline or even after as most people wait until last minute to send them off.


    We invited 68, assuming 45 would rsvp yes and ended up with 65 saying yes and coming so you just never know.

    • Reply
  • Tiffany
    Savvy February 2020
    Tiffany
    • Flag

    We had a few people RSVP right away, but we went with online RSVP through our wedding wire website actually! I had to message a few people a couple days after the RSVP date, but we ended up hearing from everyone in a reasonable amount of time. I was stressing out about it, too! But it all worked out in the end. Now it's time to make the seating chart!

    • Reply
  • C
    Dedicated June 2020
    Courtney
    • Flag
    Kinda funny.... I had two RSVP's in the mail when I got home today
    • Reply
  • Melle
    Legend June 2019
    Melle
    • Flag
    I would wait til after your RSVP date to follow up with people. Some people are just honestly awful about it. For my wedding I recall these people who didn't bother sending in their RSVP. And so I had to ask them for their response and they were like oh yeah, we are coming ... Well why couldn't you just tell me then xD they assume that they'd just tell me if they can't rather than they can
    • Reply
  • Sabrina
    Dedicated September 2020
    Sabrina
    • Flag
    I would say yes, that is even what the checklist says. Call those who have not RSVPd. Best of luck!
    • Reply

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