Save the Date doesn’t specifically say “save the Date” on it.

This is what the design of our Save the Date looked like. This is just the sample from the Minted website.

Since your wedding a little under two years away, I would think it's common sense it's a Save the Date. Did it link your wedding website? You could post on their that only save the dates have been sent out.

Those are gorgeous! If we're being honest, it must be the older crowd that doesn't understand save the dates. If I received that in the mail, I would automatically assume it was a save the date and a formal invitation would follow in the coming months. Ours actually said "save the date" on the front and a lot of our guests asked where the RSVP cards were or let us know they would be there... Do not feel stupid or embarrassed at all. A lot of people just don't understand save the dates.

Your STD is gorgeous. To me, it's pretty obvious what it is given there is no RSVP card and the date is many months away. However, some people need things to be spelled out, and having the words Save The Date helps. Don't beat yourself up over it, since there's nothing you can do about it. As for your FMIL, sounds like she could have handled the situation better just by telling people, yes, that's the STD. She knows darn well it's not the invitation. Also, she may have said she got a "bunch" of calls and that may have actually been 2. Don't sweat it. If people are confused, they'll call you.

View Quoted Comment Hi,
That is just the example of our save the date. Our wedding is in June of 2019. So just about 7 months away. I didnt want to post a real photo of ours for privacy reason.

View Quoted Comment

Ohhhh, sorry for my mistake! Well still, 7 months is awhile out for invites. I think you are fine. Since you'll send invites anyway, people will realize it wasn't an invite when they get the actual invite. Plus there wasn't anyway for people to RSVP

Don’t work yourself up over it. After we sent STD, some of my parents friends reached out to them saying they’d be there. I said, “that’s great, I’ll worry about it when the invites go out to whether or not they’re actually coming”

My STDs don’t have “Save the Date” printed on them either. It never even occurred to me that people wouldn’t figure it out. We’ll see I guess!

I agree I think only older guests would be confused.

Dont worry yourself about it.

Save the dates are a pretty new thing so many guests won't have received them before. Yes the words would have helped because they might recognise them or could look it up but we still had a few people try to RSVP to us anyway. It's not a big deal and not worth being upset over, you can just clarify with anyone who asks

There is nothing to be done about it now except to move on. By the time June comes around, this will be a distant memory.

I wish that your FMIL had handled it more gracefully. She could have gotten clarification from you and then given your guests the proper information. It isn't helpful to tell you what you should have done differently.

For generations, and huge numbers of people now, no one used Save the Dates. They have been a commercial product that has only existed a little over 15 years. What people did and do now was write, call, email the info to those definitely invited, long before invitations. Or have a postcard printed. And usually had a line, or said, "invitation to follow in MONTH " so people would k ow. Even when you use save the date cards, lots of brides I know get questions, or written replies to their " invitation" saying yes or no. Much of the general population has never seen a SAVE, and so that they do not know what they are either. If as you make further plans and are sure of your numbers, you send out a bunch more, now you are sure of plans, add a line to say, we thought you would appreciate advance notice. You will receive the invitation in MONTH. I have done some calling for friends, sisters, cousins who are brides and did not RSVP by 3 days after date. And a high number say, six months ago ( or whatever) when I got the invitation the first time, I said I was/ was not coming. I thought this one was my pass to get in the venue. I did not know I supposed to send it back. . . Always good to remember how few parents teach there children manners or social etiquette these days. Lots of people able to write a thank you note by age 7 have never do e it by age 20, because if any were written, mommy did it. And they do not know, rsvp is French for please reply. So they see a meal card, fill it out, and think they will turn it in as they enter the reception, to get the right meal. No idea they were supposed to send back the card with the meal choice. A lot of no rsvp calls made by family of the couple or the couple over missing rsvp's are not people who forget to send them. A lot are clueless about the meaning of an abbreviation from another language they do not speak. And get to be 22 or 40 without ever having replied to any invitation they received except by phone or computer. Or saying something in conversation months before. When I was a student and worked catering for tuition money, weddings surprised me. Because my parents specifically taught manners, someone who walked into a wedding, looked at the seating chart or cards, wrote their table number on their rsvp card that had meal choice, and handed it to wait staff, always surprised me. But really, no one ever taught them what to do. And when they did not respond, some exasperated bride or rep. called and they said they were coming. And they never outright said, that little card and meal choice were supposed to have been sent back. So the next wedding, again they would not send back rsvp, again bride called, and again they brought their meal choice card to the wedding. And no one would dream of telling them, you've got it wrong. And time after time they repeat the mistake. And when a wait staff would take cards, because you did not correct a guest, they never told them either. And after 5 or so weddings of classmates or friends where they never knew, and did things wrong, they start to plan a wedding, and learn they have been wrong for years. Read past posts, posters here confess now and again. I did not know I was supposed to get a gift for a wedding. I never sent anyone a thank you for anything in my life. And never sent back any invitation cards, brides always called me. And these brides to be post about something related and say, I can't believe I have done things wrong for years, why didn't anyone ever say anything? . .Save the dates, or the idea that everyone invited to a wedding will get advance notice, is a new idea to lots of people, because they are a recent invention of the wedding industry. So even when cards say, Save the date, a lot of people do not know they are different from actual invitations. Anyone who orders SAVES should really have a line saying when actual invitations will be sent. Save a lot of confusion.