Same month marriage

You really only get one day (or, in certain circumstances, a weekend/cluster of 2-3 days) for your wedding. I can understand being hurt if she did it maliciously (which, do you know that for sure? She probably has reasons) but you don't get to claim a month for your wedding. Will there be a large overlap in guests? Will your wedding locations be far apart and hard for people to travel between?

There's really nothing you can do about it, and it's not worth the stress.

Well I see your side, I really do, however you cannot dictate when she can have her big day. Now if she was serious in that she just wanted to get married before you then that is petty and I am not sure I would really have a hard time having a good relationship with her.

It seems childish on both ends to be quite honest. Why do you want to get married before her anyway? One of our groomsman was also engaged and set his date and so while we were figuring out ours he kept pushing us to be married after him. Are you afraid of the comparisons of weddings? Because every day is special and unique.

How rude!!! It seems like she is competing with you and trying to push your buttons. Listen. DO NOT LET IT PHASE YOU. You can’t let her think she’s getting to you or taking away from your days if that’s her intention. Focus on your day and making it the dream wedding you want. I’d get my STDs/rsvps and invites out first. To try and insure that the overlapping families confirm they will be attending your wedding as well as hers. Don’t give her anymore information about your wedding and don’t feed into her negative energy. She may try to steal ideas from you use the same vendors or find ways to sabotage your day. Keep her at a distance and focus on yourself
Your FH and all the positive things going on in your life. You’re getting married !!! Be happy!! Can’t let anyone steal your joy. Your day will
Be perfect that’s all that matters.

I actually disagree with some of the PPs here. I fully see why you’re frustrated if you’re date is set and she set hers for the same month. I understand not having a “monopoly” on wedding months but since you’re in the same family and will likely have a cross-over of guests, I feel its unfair to ask close friends and family to give up basically two weekends in a row to attend weddings. I also think as a guest I would want more space between commitments where I have to provided a gift, find a babysitter, etc. So i think you are totally valid in being hurt and annoyed. Unfortunately, I don’t think there’s anything you can do about it if she’s adamant. But I think she should reconsider just for the sake of everyone else’s time.

I read this as: I told my step sister when I was getting married and she set her date a week and a half before mine just to be spiteful.
She may not have been spiteful (and I hope that's the case). Have you spoken with her or your common parent? It may be that she really liked the month. I HOPE that, should you both decide to keep your dates the same that any overlapping guests would see that this was not your intention and your date had in fact been set first.
@Melle, some families, including my own, can get rather territorial about dates UNLESS one couple has been married for decades first. One of my cousins got married on my grandparents 50th wedding anniversary. Of course there was a party to celebrate them. Of course it had been in the works for years. Of course feelings were hurt and of course people spent a decade not talking to each other because of it. Was it healthy, no. Did my cousin want it that way, no. Her mom asked her to move the date, so she did. It wasn't maliciously intended on my cousin's part nor her mom's. They just saw the beauty of celebrating the love of the grandchildren on the same day exactly 50 years after the celebration of the love of the grandparents. So, as I said before, there may be some other reason besides malintent. Talk to her, talk to your common parent, get to the bottom of it. If it's simply about getting married first, let her have her day, your guests will find it petty and annoying. If you can't let it go after the conversations and she refuses to change her date, change yours. Just don't tell her until the week or two before. ^^^^^ My family deals in petty. It's genetically encoded.

I guess I can understand your side here. But in the end, you will both be married, regardless of what day you do it on. So why does it matter? Your step-sister clearly did this to strike your nerve, so don’t let her. Otherwise, she wins.

You get one wedding day. Not a week, not a month. One day.

Have you ever seen bride wars? Lol but in all seriousness just enjoy your day and try to let it go. Don't let it get to you. Remember the only thing that matters is you marrying the one you love!!

How old are you? This seems like an immature response from both of you.
Let it go. Enjoy your day.

Weddings aren't competition.

View Quoted Comment Yes this is out of spite and to be the first to get married. We exchanged words and I let her know she iant invited anymore to my wedd9ng as she has been like this her whole life and this was just the ic9ng on the cake.
My mom. My sister. And our dad all hate that she decides on that day as its 9 days before and it puts financial stress on our parents and it's just really rude of her to do that.
Also she's having a small party in the summer to celebrate getting married and her wedding date doesnt matter other than to get married before me. So I'm just upset that she cant wait till summer to get married so she can do the reception right after

Run to the courthouse and throw a hella reception!! Lol

View Quoted Comment I can understand why you would be upset! I would be too. Clearly your family is upset too.
I understand having to invite a sibling, I had to uninvited my half sister before she even knew I was engaged for pulling her millionth "this family even is about me" stunt. Unfortunately for you, your family is caught in the crossfire. She could have waited, she just wants to upset your day and money/gift grab for hers.

View Quoted Comment Actually, that varies by culture. Some do month long celebrations for one wedding.

View Quoted Comment Since she scheduled hers out of spite, maybe talk to your parents about their involvement in both weddings. Remind them how important they are to your day.

View Quoted Comment In spring so you can say your reception was first. Lol #Petty

View Quoted Comment Hahaha I have tried to convince my fiancee but he wants to wait for our planned date