Rude to invite someone last minute?

I say no its not rude as long as you don't tell them they are being invited because someone else said no lol

I don't think its rude, especially during COVID.

If you do invite someone else, make sure it's not someone who dwells on these things. We got a last minute invite to a friends' wedding a couple years ago, an so did another couple we know. She just wouldn't stop being butthurt about having been put on the "B list"... Her running commentary ("oh look, second category seats get cake too!") ruined half of our evening, in the end we just left them at the table and went dancing and never came back. But if there is someone who you know wishes you well and would be happy to be there, definitely invite them!

View Quoted Comment Arg! How awkward! Good to know :/ Hopefully we wouldn’t run into that with it being so small…

I wouldn't say it's rude, but there are people who no matter what that will see it as an after thought, or they will see themselves as B-listed, because they are. I don't mean that to be mean, but by definition, they are. Another way you can play it off "ish" is say we just found your invite, somehow it didn't make it to the post office

View Quoted Comment We’ll what’s funny is that our invitations are actually already super late because we had to make a last minute change. So there’s actually a real excuse why the invite is so late, almost same time as everyone else haha

View Quoted Comment I wouldn't lie to anyone, the wedding is so small that it will definitely come out and that would make it really awkward and uncomfortable.
As long as it's someone you know well and who wishes you well, go for it! People will understand. Don't put it to them as an afterthought, say something like "we really wanted to have you in our wedding but weren't able to invite you because of budget/place constraints/Covid, but we now have two extra places and would be so happy if you could make it". It doesn't have to be something bad, make it into a positive gesture.

I agree with Chloe. I personally wouldn't do this because I wouldn't be able to choose just 1-2 people. But if you pick someone that's understanding just explain the circumstances to them and it should be fine.

I would totally understand if I was the invitee- especially as it’ s really small wedding! I’d be happy to share the day with you!

Yes that is B listing which is seen as rude. Many people would rather not be invited than to be your 2nd or 5th choice, which they know they are when they invite is sent last minute. If someone can’t attend, you don’t fill their spot. You make do with a smaller guest list.

I personally wouldn't be offended if someone invited me last minute if they had an opening. Weddings are expensive and I totally get that even if you'd love to invite everyone you can think of, you can't always. I agree with Chloe that as long as you know the people you're thinking of won't see it in a negative light, I don't think there's anything wrong with asking.

Anytime someone feels like a second choice, there's a chance that they will be hurt. Therefore B listing is considered rude. You have no way of predicting how someone is going to react. Instead I would see if the venue can provide small upgrades since you're two meals down. Another option would be to ask for the meals to be boxed up for you to either give away or have the next day.

I've been a last minute guest before twice at super small weddings and it was totally fine. Most people understand

View Quoted Comment

You understood, but some people don't. Is it worth offending someone?