RSVP response rate

248 of 250 invited guests responded 10 days before the due date. Save the dates were sent out 10 months before. Responses were requested online, via our wedding website's RSVP page.

Usually your venue and cater have to have a head count at what point? Is it at the 10 days prior for the official date?

@Crystal our caterer needs the final count 1 week before.

You're doing better than us. We've got 29 out of 130...deadline is tomorrow. I've heard some random word of mouth responses from my parents but unfortunately that doesn't really help us with what we have to order for wine and food preferences. I relayed to my parents that if they talk to anyone they should ask what they want when someone tells them that they're coming. Unfortunately it only helps a little bit. I'm planning on calling guests over the next week after the deadline. I left a one week buffer between the deadline and when we have to have our final count due to our caterer to deal with this exact scenario.

That's better than we had. We were missing about 40-45% after our deadline passed.

Annoyingly, not a single family from FH's paternal side RSVP'd on time, and there were 14 invites sent to that side.

I should have also said, it's 70% of 115 invited.

@jaskra and @fallinthegarden, that's so frustrating! Some of our missing RSVPs are his extended family that may not get the RSVP thing. But we sent a stamped, pre-addressed envelope. Come on, people.

Mine has been terrible!! I'd say about 20-30% so far have actually SENT their rsvp card back. We're 6 days out. So many people are just like, "do we have to send that thing back or is this okay?" Agh! No, it's not okay! We spent a hundred+ dollars on stamps and all you have to do is check and throw it in the mail. It's incredibly annoying!

ETA: Oh yeah, and not ONE of FH's immediate family has sent theirs back!

We did online RSVPs and had the majority of them on time. For the stragglers, we sent texts the next day and had 100% of the 103 RSVPs by one day after. I would start with texts or messaging and if you don't get a response then call them. It helps eliminate some of the awkwardness. We just said something like "Hi! We are finalizing our RSVPs and noticed we don't have yours yet. Just wanted to check to see if you'll be able to join us for our wedding. Of course we understand if you can't make it but hope you can join us. Please let me know when you have a second. Thanks!" Most people responded apologetically and we just told them it's no problem we understand how busy life can be.

@Fall - that's funny because all but one of our missing ones were FH maternal family! Only two of them responded before the deadline.

@PG, I know!! One of my brothers said the same thing.

His step-grandmother insisted that she bring step dad's former step-sister that I've never met (and her kids) as her guests, and we agreed to keep the peace. Yet step-grandmother hasn't even RSVP'd. Arrgh.

I was just looking through our responses and clucking my teeth. Most of the missing responses (deadline was the 12th) are family that I know are coming but just haven't RSVPed. One is my Maid of Honor!

I'm missing ~25 from 60 invites sent. So nearly half. Luckily I gave myself a ton of wriggle room on the deadline, but it's still annoying.

We STILL have stragglers I'm trying to track down! It is frustrating!

I have a couple of months before sending out invites, but reading this thread just to get an idea of what to expect. I have to admit I've been guilty of neglecting to send back the RSVP but I definitely will be better about it in the future! Hope y'all hear back from who you need to soon!

We had about 10 people we had to follow up with. 3 of those have still been very wishy washy, "Ill probably be there". I just had to be firm and say I have to give an exact head count by X date. I can make small changes 2 weeks out but honestly I need to order my escort cards / do my seating chart. So if those three people actually show up they will just have to sit wherever.

I would use more definitive language when making your calls/texts/emails. Your guests already know that you need a response, they don't care and they didn't reply. Choose your wording so you only have to make one contact.

"Hi, I am contacting you because we haven't received your rsvp. Our caterer needs final numbers. If we don't hear from you by ____ (give them 24 hours only or they will forget and you've accomplished nothing) we will have to assume you are unable to make it and will miss you at the wedding."

Date twin! We had about 50%. Luckily I was able to text or FB message most of the people so it was an easy copy and paste.

I empathized with the bridal party not responding. Several of Mine didn't since there wasn't a good choice on the response card. I sent them all a message if I don't have your response card, I'll assume you are leaving after the ceremony and won't save you a place for dinner. You're welcome to come back after dinner to dance, but no drinking. Amazing how fast I got those responses! Mind you that was my brother & sister in law, my best friend and his brother.

Others I left a message, we haven't received a response, if we don't hear from you by Friday we'll assume you aren't coming. I hope to hear from you.

We had a 98% return rate! We are both 52 and it was my hub's first marriage so I think people were like, "Really? HE is getting married? This I gotta see!"

Call and be direct and firm: We need our numbers for the caterer/venue. Will you be joining us? Please respond with the next day. Thank you.

Your wedding is in a few weeks, people know if they will be free or not.

I had about 1/3 of RSVPs missing by the time our deadline rolled around

We mailed our invitations and requested RSVPs online via our wedding website. We invited a total of 216 guests and by the deadline, received replies (both yes and no) for 170 guests, or 79%. We had to pester the other 46 people for a response (11 of which had invites returned to sender or lost in the mail).