rsvp Deadlines & Extensions

It depended on how close we were to when we needed to give the venue final numbers. If I reached out to them on Monday and my venue needed final numbers the following Monday I told them I would need to know by that weekend or we would have to count them as a no. Some people were waiting on work schedules so I let them know what the date was that I couldn’t make changes.

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OH!!!! I see what you're saying!! Thanks so much, Kelly!

I told them I need to know by tomorrow. I had a vendor pressuring me for numbers earlier than expected, plus I had given them so long to rsvp already.

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Hey Mrs. Sarantos, I totally hear where you're coming from. Why can't fam, friends, coworkers etc just rsvp on time?? Sigh... thank you so much

It depended. Some people needed more time due to their schedules and others I just said another week or so.

View Quoted Comment Thank you Melle!!

We only had to reach out to 3 households. We simply sent a text saying “Hey ____, we realized we did not received your RSVP for the wedding. We are working on our final headcount now. If you could let us know if you and ___ will be able to attend, we would really appreciate it! We hope you can make it and can’t wait to celebrate with you!”

All of them responded with their RSVP within minutes lol. I think sending something similar and then letting it sit for a day or so, you will get a response. If not, you simply follow up again saying that you really need a response or you take that as a no.

I gave my people 6 weeks to RSVP.
I'm having a bridal shower 6 days before the deadline for his side, so if there is anyone there who hasn't RSVPd, I may put out a reminder there.
My bachlorette party is the day after the deadline, so I'll do the same thing. My bridal shower is the next weekend, so if I don't have RSVPs from any of those ladies, I'll ask that they let me know. Hopefully that day.
My caterer basically refuses to meet again til I give him numbers. And I dont have numbers til Mid/Early March like he requested... but he's also been asking if I have numbers since mid January...So I'll probably give them a day or two. But not much longer.If theyve had 6 weeks to consider, they should know their answer.

I think sometimes people just forget. I would reach out to them and ask whether or not they are coming. If they were unable to tell me on the spot, I'd say, "If there is anything we can do to help let us know, but we do need an answer by THIS DATE or we will have to count your RSVP as a no." Frankly I think if they had a deadline and didn't honor it, that's on them. I view the original deadline as "please say yes or no before this time otherwise you'll be counted as a no" but think following up is important because sometimes people just do forget, or they are waiting on some specific detail (time off work, finding childcare or a pet sitter, etc) before they can commit.

My FH and I gave our guests 5 extra days from the date we reached out to them. Our RSVP date was January 15th. We contacted those we hadn't heard from on January 20th and asked them to respond by January 25th or we would have to mark them as not attending. We explained that we needed to get our final numbers to our caterer and venue and if we did not have a response by text, email or phone call by the 25th at 10pm, they would be marked as not attending.

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It's often not about how long they've had to decide, it's about how close it is to the date. Some people can't know for sure if they're available until closer to the date of the wedding (e.g. because of various arrangements that have to be made, time off requests, etc.). That's why the suggested RSVP timeline is to put the deadline no more than a month from the wedding date.

Thank you all so much for your feedback!!

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