rsvp date 2 months before the wedding

“I would love to rsvp yes to your wedding however given the uncertainty of travel requirements at this time, I am unable to commit.
I can commit on X date. Let me know if this is acceptable. I understand the difficult decision this puts you in and respect your reply.”

Just decline if you’re not committed. They’d rather you decline than accept and then you back out after and they have to pay for you.

View Quoted Comment I like this solution


2 months seems early for an RSVP deadline, covid or not.

View Quoted Comment I second this! Most final numbers for vendors are due no earlier than 30 days out. She probably set an early rsvp date in anticipation of having to track down people who don’t respond by the deadline. I’d give her a call or text and explain your situation, and see if there is a later date you could give her an answer by.

I agree with PP in contacting your friend and explaining the situation.

Agree with the first poster. No venue needs the final guest count two months prior, so she is likely just doing it for her own information. Also due to covid she may be doing A lists and B lists, if she doesnt get enough RSVPs she’ll move on to the next list. So yeah saying you can commit at a later time is probably fine in this case

That seems really early... I agree with what other ppl said. I would tentatively declined and see if they will allow to follow up closer to the date. I didn’t have my rsvps due until feb 28th which gave a week and half for the stranglers. And by the 13th of March if I didn’t have anymore rsvps I gave my final counts to the vendors.

Likely people sending one round of invitations, pushing people way to early, so they can issue a second round of invitations when some decline. B listing. It os considered rude for a reason. Many people can not answer due to notice from work under 30 days, or other important things. Call them. Explain that you intend to go if possible, you have not simply forgotten. And agree that you will telephone at 1 month out ( so not dealing with mail) to let them know for sure. This has been a trying year for all.

Wow, that is super early. My wedding is one weekend before that one and my RSVP deadline is April 24th which includes a 2 week cushion to follow-up with any stragglers. I agree with the previous poster that it seems they are doing two rounds of invitations which seems pretty rude to me (although I understand in these pandemic times that they want to reach their capacity and may not with only inviting a small number... but yeah, rude.) Maybe reach out and let them know your dilemma.

This is an excellent example for those who try to send out invites 3 months ahead why it's a bad idea. Invites are sent out at 6-8 weeks before the wedding, period. Decline because no one can commit to anything that early.. The rest of their guest list will have forgotten by that time.

I'd reach out and say you're not comfortable committing so early bc of COVID but are a tenative yes and really want to come. IF she says that's not ok, then decline now. If she's flexible (she should be, 2 months out is silly) then great! But you wont' know unless you ask.