RSVP Card - Ceremony, Reception, or both?

Why would people attend the reception and not the ceremony? That's pretty rude.

We always go to both ceremony and reception, even if they are far apart. Get enough chairs for everyone you invite

I've had situations before where I was tied up earlier in the day but was able to make it to the reception. And I've also been to weddings where other people have had the same type of situation.

Isn't the reception where you need the head count anyway? dont break it out, just have 1 rsvp

I don't mean 2 different RSVPs, just have them check if they're attending both or reception-only

Eh... to each their own I guess. But gap or not, I wouldn't feel comfortable going to just a reception. Two wrongs don't make a right.

ETA: just have one line of RSVP, by having the two you're basically opening up for people not to come to your ceremony. Is that your goal?

Guests should go to both but unfortunately some people are rude and don't. However you don't need ceremony numbers. Order enough chairs for full attendance. If a few skip it's not a big deal if you have a few empty chairs in the back.

I agree with @LB. If you don't care to go to the ceremony then don't go to any wedding events at all. It's like saying "I don't care that you're getting married but I'll show up for the free food and booze."

I have seen many instances where more guests attend the reception than the ceremony. This is especially the case when they are in two different locations and there is a large gap in between. I don't find it rude.

In any case, I would not set up your rsvp card that way. IMO it does invite people to only attend one part. I would assume all guests are attending both. If you end up renting more chairs than needed, oh well.

Unless there is a large gap and distance between ceremony and reception I have never seen anyone skip one and go to the other. To me the ceremony is the important part, and the reception is the celebration of the union that just took place, I would feel very rude celebrating something I couldn't make time to attend.

I think that's perfectly fine to have two lines

You need to jsut have one and assume that everyone will do the right thing and come to both.

You cannot control why people do not make it to the ceremony - sometimes people are rude and only go to the reception, sometimes people get stuck in traffic. Sometimes someone's kid gets really upset and they are late getting out the door,

Stuff happens. have one accepts with pleasure line, order chairs for everyone and call it a day.

eta: If I was a guest and saw this I would be pretty insulted that someone would assume I would come to one but not the other - or I would think not everyone was invited to both and would have to call you to confirm, and that would also be kind of insulting.

I think it's fine to have two lines. I don't think it's rude at all to ask your guests if they'll attend both.

As a guest, though, I might see this as odd, since you usually expect to attend both, not one or the other. But as PPs have said, keep in mind, by giving them the option, you may have more people skip one or the other than you would if you didn't ask this way. It's really a know your crowd type of thing. Would you expect quite a few people to skip the ceremony?

We have a fair amount of people attending from distances (over an hour or 2 away) so I understand if they can't devote their entire day to us plus 2-3+ hours of driving time, I can possibly see a few of those guests maybe only attending the reception. (We will be reserving blocks of hotel rooms but I understand if people don't want to get a hotel room)

I would never dream of attending just the reception, I agree with PP, assume everyone is attending both. 20 minutes is a reasonable distance between locations...

I don't think anyone is going to admit they aren't coming to your ceremony to watch you get married but are coming to your reception with free food and alcohol and quite frankly I wouldn't want to know if people were doing that to me or not (ours are in the same location, problem averted). I'd just have enough chairs handy.

@Brittany F I agree with you. Some people won't attend both esp older ppl attending. Especially if it's around 6 or later. I like your idea of the three options so you will know in advance how to coordinate the chairs and reception space etc

We had separate locations and some people did not attend our ceremony. If there's more then a 20 minute gap, that will also effect attendance. We used a website so we have an RSVP option for both. I think the way you suggested sounds fine. We also had people not "respond" to the ceremony and only the reception, so know that's a possibility too!

I could understand doing this for a weekday wedding where people might not be able to get away from work early, but not for a Saturday. It just makes people more likely to skip the ceremony because you've offered them the option.

Most people not showing up will be a last minute decision and some people may change their mind not realising that you needed that number for seating. Stick to one RSVP line.

IDK if I've been to a wedding where at least 1 couple didn't fail to attend the ceremony & only arrives in time for the reception. The only butt hurt people get is paying for dinners when guests don't show up at all.

We had 99 RSVP yes, only enough chairs for 76 (more were available if needed; but we actually had a few empty seats) & 91 attended the reception. It was a 5pm, Fri wedding ceremony...so no-shows were expected for the ceremony.

Personally, I don't see any harm in adding 2 lines.

I wouldn't think it rude if I saw two lines on the RSVP card. I've been to a ceremony at a really tiny church so we were standing outside for the entirety of it. I normally try to attend both ceremony and reception for every wedding, however, if I were to receive an invitation from someone outside of my closest circles and saw two lines on the RSVP and then saw the ceremony was at that same tiny church... I'd probably just check "reception."