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Just Said Yes March 2017

Roles for Friends Who Aren't Bridesmaids

Lindsay, on October 12, 2016 at 12:12 PM Posted in Etiquette and Advice 0 36
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Does anybody have any ideas for friends who aren't bridesmaids (outside of "reader") but you would still like for them to have an active role? UPDATE: "Role" was probably the wrong word. Basically, I'm just wondering if anyone has had the situation where I think a good friend is going to be sad that she isn't a bridesmaid so I was wondering if there were any other ways people have made those individuals still feel like they have an elevated/special place in the wedding to make them feel special

36 Comments

Latest activity by Christina, on January 22, 2021 at 6:05 PM
  • GymRat
    Master May 2017
    GymRat ·
    • Flag

    Guest.

    • Reply
  • GoingBALDwin!!!!!
    Master April 2017
    GoingBALDwin!!!!! ·
    • Flag

    What are the roles of your bridesmaids?

    • Reply
  • mimitrue
    Master January 2016
    mimitrue ·
    • Flag

    Gym rat nailed it.

    • Reply
  • OnTheWayToMrsA
    Super August 2017
    OnTheWayToMrsA ·
    • Flag

    I have to agree that they should just be a guest if they aren't in the bridal party. I asked a similar question shortly after getting engaged and was told it's rude to ask people to "play a role" in the wedding if they aren't in the bridal party itself.. almost like a consolation prize. I realized they're right, it's better to just have them as guests.

    • Reply
  • MoweryMe
    VIP April 2017
    MoweryMe ·
    • Flag

    A guest would do perfectly :-)

    • Reply
  • SleepytheDwarf
    Master June 2017
    SleepytheDwarf ·
    • Flag

    Guest

    • Reply
  • GoingBALDwin!!!!!
    Master April 2017
    GoingBALDwin!!!!! ·
    • Flag

    The reason I had asked what the roles of the bridesmaids are, is because this post is confusing. Role as in standing by you at the ceremony? Or role as in, " you are in charge of this, and you are in charge of that" ??

    If they aren't BP then they are guest. Don't B-list.

    • Reply
  • SoonToBeDames
    Expert November 2016
    SoonToBeDames ·
    • Flag

    Please don't have a guest book attendant.

    • Reply
  • MAMW
    VIP August 2013
    MAMW ·
    • Flag

    Just a guest. There's nothing else for them to do if they aren't a bridesmaid other than be a reader, since being a guest book attendant shouldn't be a thing.

    • Reply
  • Jessinlove
    VIP November 2016
    Jessinlove ·
    • Flag

    Guest.

    • Reply
  • Loganna
    Super October 2016
    Loganna ·
    • Flag

    Besides readers, ushers and greeters are good ways to honor people who are special to you, if you need them. I wouldn't create a role for someone, though.

    • Reply
  • Khakis
    Devoted February 2016
    Khakis ·
    • Flag

    If you're worried they're going to be sad they aren't a bridesmaid you should've made them one before.

    • Reply
  • Sunshine
    VIP September 2017
    Sunshine ·
    • Flag

    Don't have a bridal party! All feelings spared.

    • Reply
  • Kellie
    Beginner March 2017
    Kellie ·
    • Flag

    I have been dealing with a similar situation. I don't want my roommate to be a bridesmaid. (We've been friends for many years, but I know how she can be when she doesn't get her way and I'm not about to deal with that on my wedding day.) So, she's going to be my "proxy bride" for the ceremony rehearsal. This way I can stand back and look at everything and make any changes I want to make. This also gives her a role that's not quite as special as a bridesmaid, but has a little more importance than just handing out programs or something like that. It also prevents feelings from being hurt because she's still involved without being INVOLVED if you know what I mean. I'm from Mississippi, so it might just be Southern tradition to have a proxy bride for the rehearsal, but it's really helped my situation.

    • Reply
  • SoonToBeDames
    Expert November 2016
    SoonToBeDames ·
    • Flag

    Hahahah...proxy bride. That's a joke post, right?

    • Reply
  • Helena Handbasket
    Master February 2016
    Helena Handbasket ·
    • Flag

    Proxy bride....huh. So she is such a good friend that she gets to stand there. Not during ceremony but during rehearsal. Wow. Aren't you a great friend.

    • Reply
  • Sunshine
    VIP September 2017
    Sunshine ·
    • Flag

    Kellie...really??? Seriously? I've never heard of this nor do I think this is a good idea. If someone asked me to be a proxy bride I would be seriously offended.

    • Reply
  • StuckOnYou
    Expert March 2017
    StuckOnYou ·
    • Flag

    Reader and escorts are the only other ones I can think of. Some of my family members offered to help set up the hall/dessert table day of...I think it was because they wanted to be involved. Not sure if that's what you're looking for...

    • Reply
  • cupcakecardinal
    Devoted November 2017
    cupcakecardinal ·
    • Flag

    I hope this 'proxy bride' is not a single friend, because I think if I was single and someone said 'why don't you pretend you're getting married for me' that would not go over well. I have never heard of a 'proxy bride' before.

    • Reply
  • Y&F
    VIP November 2016
    Y&F ·
    • Flag

    Guest

    • Reply

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