Ring Question

Go by the fit you want after marriage. Larger. Then buy a ring insert, a little plastic or foam band that fits inside the underpart of the ring, to make it fit snug, so you can wear a larger ring on a smaller finger without slippage. Take it off in 1 second when transferring your ring to it's permanent home on your bigger right hand. Groom tucks it in his pocket after. I use vibrating power tools for work, and for work on our farm, and the vibrations make my hands swell. So I wear a size piece mornings or non working days, take the sizer out when I put my ring back on after work til the minor swelling goes down. Have you ever used the thin gel like plastic backings that go on earrings , instead of metal? Little piece of that stuff, comfortable because flexible. In high school "going steady" rings when a girl wears her boyfriend's ring, often those insert are how they keep the bigger ring on their smaller finger. So, commonly available.

View Quoted Comment Maybe I was unclear — I want to wear both engagement ring because the original is so beautiful and special, but the new one is part of a set. And my right ring finger is bigger than my left, so moving my original engagement ring to my right hand might not work easily.

I order ones from a catalog that sells all one size, because I know what fits, and order 100 for $12. But this from Amazon will give you an idea.

View Quoted Comment You are still not understanding. Neither ring is too large for my left hand. The problem is that the original engagement ring is tight in my right hand.


I want to wear the original ring on my right hand though, so I can wear the one from the set on my left. And if I have the one from the set on my left, do I wear it with one of the bands and at the wedding have the other put on?

This is a bit unusual, so I see why people are confused. I’m not even sure I understand the question.


Make sure your jeweler can resize your original engagement ring. On wedding day, wear your original engagement ring on the right hand. For the ring exchange, put on how every many of your new three rings as you want and feel confident you can coordinate. Whether that’s one, two or all three, do whatever feels right for you. After the ceremony you can add whatever ring(s) you didn’t place on your hand during ceremony. Or if you solder the set together then it’s just like putting one ring on. To me the three rings are your wedding set (not engagement) so I’d wait to wear them until the wedding.

View Quoted Comment I see what you’re saying.


My question is though: I’m thinking about replacing my current engagement ring with the one from the set. If I do that, which ring(s) from the set would I put on now? One band and the engagement ring because the other band will “seal” the set? Or just the engagement ring and before the wedding add a band?

Personally I would just wear your new engagement ring now and then if you want on the day of the wedding you could wear the old one on your right hand, wear nothing on your left hand and have him put the whole set on you at the ceremony.

Are you planning on having the wedding bands soldered together? You could do that beforehand so it's easier for him to put the whole set on your finger during the ceremony.

I went to a wedding where the ring exchange was three rings like that for the bride and it was a little strange the way they did it because they had each groomsman hold one aha so just have one person holding the set together would look better

View Quoted Comment Yeah, that seems weird, which is why my thought process was wearing the closer band and the engagement ring now, and adding the second band on top at the ceremony.

I personally wouldn’t wear either of the bands pre-wedding, but that’s just me— I like the idea of wedding bands versus engagement ring. That’s personal though, so if you want to wear one of the bands already, go for it. If you don’t want to just yet, but want to day of the ceremony, it’s fine to pop the band on under the ring right before you walk down the aisle , so the ring exchange during the ceremony is just the top ring.


For ring exchange during the ceremony, I’d consider one of 2 options:1. Wearing the original E ring on the original finger, FH has the full set of 3 rings, and places them together directly on to your finger. You can switch the OG E ring over to your right hand right beforehand.2. Wear your E rings as normal, and at ring ceremony time, slip it off and hand it to him, and he can put all 3 on at once. It’s a small amount of fumbling for him maybe to set them up, but I don’t really think it would be too much that it seems awkward .Actually, another option 3. Wear your new E ring normally, and have him just slip both new bands on your finger during the exchanging of rings. Then right after you walk down the aisle, you can slip them off and stack them in the correct order. I only had one band, but this is basically what I did. I left my E ring on for the ceremony, and H just put the wedding band on on top of it. I wear my wedding band under it normally, so, after the ceremony ended I quickly popped them off then flipped them.
All options I think are fine, it’s just a matter of what feels most comfortable for you.

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Having her try and get all 3 rings on at once would be a struggle haha. That’s part of why I like the idea of having one of the bands on beforehand.

She and I are also not super traditional. For one thing, we’re an interracial lesbian couple. Another thing is that we aren’t doing any surprises in terms of attire. When I went dress shopping (and ultimately fell in love with a dress, which I absolutely wasn’t expecting to, but it happened lol), it was just me and her. She knew I had final say on the dress since I’m the one who will be wearing it, but her input definitely made a difference. Any dress she didn’t like was nixed.

View Quoted Comment Whoops , sorry I read “his and hers” set and just assumed 🙊


Honestly it wouldn’t be weird bad or wrong to practice a couple options of ring exchange techniques in advance to feel out what way of doing it feels most natural for you both!

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No worries!! I don’t generally go around announcing “Oh hey, I’m having a lesbian wedding!”

I’m more of a “lipstick” and she’s the more masculine one and wanted a men’s band, so it worked out perfectly for us. I’ll be wearing a dress, and she’ll be wearying a tux. We’re both very happy with that.

View Quoted Comment Gotcha. I’d probably just wear the engagement style rings alone, no band until post ceremony. Whether you wear both engagements rings or the new engagement ring plus a band before the wedding, some people may notice and ask about the rings anyways. Usually they ask from a good place, like worrying that they accidentally missed your wedding date and are late on congratulating you on surviving wedding planning. 😁

View Quoted Comment Makes sense.
Here are the two looks and I think they both look good.

Decided to wear it solo, after talking with my fiancée. Really only because I like symmetry so much and it’s gorgeous in its own.

And hopefully when we have our big wedding in two years we’ll both be able to upgrade from CZ to diamond or whatever other stone we might want, along with having gold bands. What we have for now though is more amazing than the price would suggest, and I’m a broke first year teacher and she’s a broke grad student lol.