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Just Said Yes August 2021

Resort Wedding Planning Logistics

Jennifer, on September 9, 2020 at 1:09 PM Posted in Planning 0 10
My fiancé and I are super pumped about doing a destination wedding in Sedona (we live in N.C.).


We are having it at a small resort, and their wedding package includes renting out the entire place for two days.
Super great for us, but struggling with some logistical challenges I was hoping to get your thoughts on:
1) RSVPs and booking: the place consists of 1 bedroom condos, and houses that sleep 5. We will need to assign sleeping quarters to make sure groups of friends are together, etc., but we need a final guest count to help assign sleeping quarters. I know some people are going to want to book the resort ASAP, so suggestions on how to manage that?
2) 2 night minimum to stay at the resort, since we are renting the whole resort out for 2 nights. Any suggestions on communicating that effectively? I want to make sure the resort is full so we do not have to pick up any empty rooms.

10 Comments

Latest activity by Vicky, on September 9, 2020 at 5:37 PM
  • R
    Super September 2018
    Rachel ·
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    Ug, this is not my taste as you are passing your wedding costs onto your guests, so I don’t have advice for you rather I have perspective from being on the other end. My husband has stood up in two weddings with accommodation expectations like this. One was in Mexico and the all-inclusive resort had a three night minimum. 🤑💸 So all guests were encouraged to stay on property or we had to buy day passes just to go to the wedding. The other was a property in a small town in AZ and the couple told the wedding party they were expected/preferred to stay on site. The couple did not pair anyone up, just gave the wedding party the contact info for the property and the wedding party had to work out who wanted which condos and if anyone wanted to share. There was only a two night minimum on that one, but if it were closer to Phoenix I’d rather we only stayed one night because there was nothing to do in this small town. We enjoyed ourselves at both weddings but leading up and afterwards yearned for more flexibility in where we stayed and in turn how we spent our money on those trips.


    If you want your wedding party and immediate family to have priority in staying onsite, give them the info first. If you don’t care who stays as long as the maximum amount of people book then give the info to any and every one. There is no way to guarantee the resort fully books out unless you invite more guests than rooms, the price is right and alternate accommodations are few and far between. Best of luck!
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  • Molly
    VIP September 2020
    Molly ·
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    That will be so fun! I would put the rsvp date as soon as you can. I would include a little information card with the invite explaining the 2 night minimum and the importance of rsvp'ing early.

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  • J
    Just Said Yes August 2021
    Jennifer ·
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    I unfortunately can’t afford to pay for everyone’s rooms, so that’s the expectation I set and my group is okay with it.


    Thanks for the advice
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  • J
    Just Said Yes August 2021
    Jennifer ·
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    Thank you! Good ideas!
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  • M
    VIP January 2019
    Maggie ·
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    I don't think anyone is expecting you to pay for everyone's rooms. But there are definitely a lot of potential risks, downsides, and hurt feelings with a wedding plan that requires all of your guests to book 2 nights in a specific place so far in advance, all to make your wedding cheaper for you.

    As a guest, I strongly prefer to be able to choose my own accommodations and trip length, based on my budget, vacation time, preferences, etc. I also wouldn't want to be assigned to share rooms with other guests and I probably wouldn't be able to firmly commit more than 3 months in advance.

    If I were you, I would consider all of these complications before booking this venue for your wedding.

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  • J
    Just Said Yes August 2021
    Jennifer ·
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    Yikes. I’m regretting posting on here. I just wanted some advice on best way to handle logistics and ended up being criticized multiple times for what we want to do for OUR wedding...


    Every wedding is different. We have to have a destination wedding, because my fiancé’s grandma is on the west coast and can’t make the trip to us. It’s actually more expensive on us than it would have been at our venue of choice on the east coast.
    We explained that situation, as well as the lodging situation, to our must-have guests on the east coast in advance of booking the venue. We are a large group of friends and most people want to stay on the resort, since we are scattered around and only get to see each other occasionally anyway. We are not dictating anything, and I never said that we were. My only concern was trying to fill up the venue from a cost-perspective (which means if you are staying with us on the resort, you need to stay a 2night minimum) and the logistics surrounding that.
    I wish we’d support other bride’s decisions and not tear down their wedding ideas. This is a stressful enough time as-is.
    Anyway, if you have any actual tips for my situation, please share. Otherwise, know that I’ve done the diligence I need to do and am moving forward with my wedding as stated.
    Thank you and stay safe.
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  • Margaret
    Master October 2020
    Margaret ·
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    The pros of renting an entire resort is its yours for the taking. Is there a price difference between the one bedrooms and the ones that sleep 5? And do people really want to bunk together? Unless you’re footing the entire space for your guests I wouldn’t take on the task of choosing where they bunk. It’s not fair.


    We opted to rent a large B&B for our wedding and changed our mind because of your concerns.
    We found a great resort with a 2night minimum but we aren’t guaranteeing any room nights and they held 8 nights complementary for a month prior. While most of our guests opted to stay at our resort we do have some that just didn’t want to pay their higher rates / resort fees versus other equally nice resorts nearby for less $$$
    As a guest, I want to choose what I’m paying for. I definitely don’t want to be assigned to bunk with people just because we’re “friends”
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  • H
    Devoted August 2023
    Hhh ·
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    Great question, we have a very similar venue and our approach is as follows. Most of the required rooms/accommodations will be filled with family, and They were all thrilled to all be staying onsite where the rehearsal dinner and actual wedding will be ( no transportation issues, same price as hotels, and the boys are going skeet shooting onsite during the day!). The other rooms were offered to close friends who are in the wedding party. We are collecting money and booking their spots about 9 months out. The remaining spots we are offering to the rest of the wedding party and close friends as first come first serve. The site also has cabins (that we don’t have to book) which some friends who are not in the wedding party already reserved bc they want to be as close as possible.


    That said, since your accommodations include an odd number of people, can you let guests figure it out themselves if/who they want to stay with? I would definitely suggest collecting money when they rsvp or letting the venue do it so that you don’t get left with a bill at the end!
    And finally, yes a couple people won’t enjoy the group setting (see comments above) but many people will appreciate the convenience and social atmosphere. When we go to a wedding it is to hang with friends, not to tour some random town and then retreat to our Holiday Inn room alone... 😉
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  • Shirley
    Expert November 2020
    Shirley ·
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    I think you need to put this out to your guests and let them figure it out. Let them know the room options and the cost. They can decide what is most comfortable for them. It seems like if they know the cost of a 5-person room is $X and the cost of a condo is $X, they can figure out themselves how to organize things and you won't have to assign. Or am I missing something? Do you need to fit every single guest into the venue, and they have all consented to being assigned?

    My cousin had to rent out a whole villa for his wedding, and he basically just put the rooms up on the website as first-come, first-serve. I couldn't afford to stay there, so I didn't. Other family members could afford to, so they decided how they wanted to do it. My parents got a room with my sister, my grandmother got a room to herself, four of my cousins pitched in for one room, etc.

    I don't want you to feel attacked, but I don't think there is a polite way to stipulate a 2-night minimum. As a guest, I would read that as you trying to force me to help cover the costs of your venue and I would feel put in a corner if I couldn't afford it/didn't want to pay for it. That doesn't seem to be your intention, but that would be my interpretation. As a result, I would choose not to stay in the resort and, if that meant I couldn't come to the wedding, I would skip the wedding.

    I think the unfortunate part of this is that, no matter how hard you try, you are taking on a probable risk of paying for some empty rooms. There is only so much that we as hosts can control about our guests' choices and behaviors.

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  • Vicky
    VIP January 2020
    Vicky ·
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    Well said.

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