Rehearsal Dinner, who's invited?

Let her do what she wants- she is paying. Your FH will be paying attention to you and his groomsmen anyway!

My grandparents were invited even though they weren't involved in the ceremony. Since she's paying for it, let her decide.

Also, the SO's of the bridal party need invited.

You need to let her decide since she's paying. One aunt is no big deal. You did the right thing saying no to your dad. Too many OOT guests will be chaotic and expensive. If anyone asks, just say, "FMIL is paying so we're not in charge of allowing any additional guests, sorry."

All the grandparents, bridal party, 1 aunt and uncle (they were staying with the groom's family) were at mine. It was fun!

We are paying for our own RD (along with the rest of the wedding, unfortunately but alas) so we are only inviting bridal party and their SO's, and immediate family. Grandparents and other family members not included.. they wont even know about it.

If the in-laws are hosting they get a say in the guest list.

I agree with you that the rehearsal dinner ought to be just for the people who are actually rehearsing plus their partners. But one extra aunt isn't a big deal.

My father is hosting ours, and we are just having family at ours. It's more of a meet and greet than a rehearsal dinner, since we aren't doing a formal rehearsal.

My father is paying for mine. I'm inviting the BP, grandparents, brothers of me and my FH, my FSIL, and FH grandparents. In total it is only 30 people, and we are using it as a chance for our families to mingle before the wedding.

If she is paying for it, I would let her bring her sister. I would talk about budget and how many people she can/wants to pay for before/if you invite a lot of people.

People who rehearse and their SO's, your officiant and DOC if they attend.

This is not supposed to be a stand alone event; it's a short, sweet thank you to the BP.

If she's paying, yes, she does get a say but the smaller the better. The whole next day is a series of timestamps and stress (good stress, but still stress) and the RD should be casual and relaxed.

We'd planned on just immediate family, bridal party, and SOs, but FMIL is hosting and she wanted to invite the out-of-town guests, so we'll have about 40 people at ours.

Maybe I could reply with something like.... "No thank you on the additional invites. We're looking forward to a nice relaxing evening before seeing everyone else the next day." Maybe without saying anything directly about her sister she'll get the point? In the back of my mind I'm wondering if she's mentioned one now but will add 5 or 6 by the time of the event.

I think if she was trying to invite a bunch of other people, you could draw a harder line. If it's just one aunt, I would just let it happen. She's paying, after all. If you want it your way, you can pay.

Why would it make moments awkward if his aunt is there just because they aren't really close? Who cares? If your FMIL is paying, let her invite who she wants.

We are only inviting bridal party, immediate family and our officiant. We aren't even inviting grandparents, however, if she is paying...let her invite who she wants.