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Astrid
Beginner October 2020

Regretting trying to plan a wedding

Astrid, on March 4, 2020 at 9:15 AM Posted in Family and Relationships 0 4
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My in-laws are paying for everything for our wedding, which I am beyond grateful for, but recently everyone has been so stressed. There have been so many arguments surrounding our weddings (American and Indian) that at this point I truly don’t want to even have one or the other. There have been so many tears shed, so many horrible things said, and just so much anger and sadness associated with planning and I feel at this point that it would be better to complete cancel everything even though I’ve already paid half down on my dream dress and on a venue. I just feel like it isn’t worth it if everyone is going to be so angry with each other continuously throughout the whole process. I feel as if my day isn’t as special anymore because of this. Am I overreacting? Maybe I just need some encouragement or positivity, but I really just want to call it all off for the sake of mine and my fiancé’s relationship with his parents. I’m so sad and disappointed to even be typing this Smiley sad

4 Comments

Latest activity by Melle, on March 4, 2020 at 10:25 AM
  • Rebelle Fleur
    Master July 2021
    Rebelle Fleur ·
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    Maybe you need to cut everyone out of the planning and just have you and your FH plan it. Take a break for a couple weeks then start fresh. Things that are broken can be mended. You can ask for guidance from his mother or another family member from his side even him for parts of their culture that you have to include. It’s about comprise but compromising to what you and your FH want not the families wishes.
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  • Cyndy
    Master May 2019
    Cyndy ·
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    I agree with PP. take some time off from it and then regroup and remember it’s your day.
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  • Katie
    Devoted March 2019
    Katie ·
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    You still have several months before the wedding, I agree with pp, take some time off of planning and relax! Make sure you're maintaining your relationships and spending quality, non-wedding time together - your feelings are 100% valid and you need to take some time to sort through your feelings and then share honestly with your FH. Your day is still incredibly special, never forget that!

    You definitely have a few options here:

    1. Talk to FH. If either of you truly aren't feeling the big/traditional wedding anymore, decide what you really want and go for it! Know this will have a few drawbacks (loss of deposits and angry family) but at the end of the day follow your heart!

    2. Maybe the breather and time away from planning was all you really needed and you're ready to jump back in. Have an honest convo with FH and together agree that the bad family behavior is no longer going to be tolerated. Either both of you, or FH should talk to his parents as well in a firm but non-confrontational way that you want to have a great relationship with them, and don't want any more fighting. Maybe this means keeping them at arms length while wedding planning

    3. You still want the wedding, but are truly sick of planning? Reach out and hire a wedding planner!! You can hand them all of the ideas/contracts/vendor info you already have and they will take the reigns. Also, she has no obligation to fight with the in laws and will know that as bride and groom you two call the shots.


    Whatever you decide, YOU CAN DO THIS!! Good luck girl Smiley smile

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  • M
    Legend June 2019
    Melle ·
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    As PPs have mentioned it’s really important for people to take breaks because planning something in this scale can be so overwhelming
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