Regret eloping

Married people can't have weddings, but you can and should definitely have the vow renewal of your dreams!

View Quoted Comment Wouldn’t it be totally different from a wedding? No bridesmaids, groomsmen, and dad walking me down the aisle?

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You can still have all of those things at a vow renewal. The only things that you shouldn't include in a vow renewal are things like engagement parties, showers, and bachelor(ette) parties.

View Quoted Comment I didn’t know that. I thought it would be completely different. That makes me feel a little better thank you

You can definitely still have a big wedding and don’t let anyone tell you otherwise or take that experience from you.

There is no reason why you can't still have a big celebration! I would word it either as a vow renewal or as a wedding reception.

View Quoted Comment You CAN still have a wedding celebration, or a celebration of marriage (however you want to word it) I come from a military town and a lot of couples do this. And guess what, they still call it a a wedding, not a “vow renewal” DONT let anyone tell you you can’t not have a wedding if you want one!

I would say do a vow renewal and personally do what you want. If you want a pre wedding celebration in which you do not ask for gifts I do not see the problem. Maybe just an informal party where you serve food and drinks to some close guests of the wedding. Make the vow renewal as big as you want it to be.

View Quoted Comment I think it’s just hitting me because my mother in law has a big opinion keeps calling it pointless. Thank you for giving me more confidence!

I have to do disagree with previous posters. Yes, you “can”, but why? If you got married to spend the rest of your lives together, why have so much regret over a missed party that costs months and months of rent? I definitely can respect wanting to celebrate and doing something intimate. As a guest, if I were invited to a large wedding ceremony years after the wedding, I would find it strange and feel a bit burdened to get a gift, etc. just my opinion, obviously I’m the minority here.

Forget it. But for a 10th ot 20th anniversary, do a vow renewal, if you like.

You still can do a big wedding I believe it’s called vow renewal

You can do whatever you want. Call it a wedding, reception, vow renewal, whatever. There’s a reason why people get so excited about having a wedding. It’s exciting! Sure, you already have the most important part of being married done, but there’s something so special about having a day when your closest friends and family all come together to celebrate you as a couple. I would personally love an excuse to celebrate something and go to a party. It sounds like that’s what you want, which is totally understandable. The wedding police aren’t going to come for you if you do!

Yes definitely! have a big beautiful vow renewal

I would probably wait til 5 years, if you can, and call it a vow renewal. I know these are becoming more popular with covid screwing up everyone's plans, but this is a different situation to my mind and even with covid I am not the biggest fan of the delayed reception. Since you had the opportunity to have a wedding and chose not to, as a guest I might side eye that a bit.

Wow this is very interesting. You are the first person I've heard this from. I've heard countless women say they regret having a wedding and spending thousands and thousands of dollars on an event, especially when they didn't have a house yet nor finish paying off any other loans.

Still do it! My partner and I are planning on a wedding 2022 but marry this year because of financial reasons. I had to get out of the traditional way of thinking how having a wedding should be. You could even plan it to land on or near your anniversary. Its never too late! Good luck!