Really disappointed in my Maid of Honor

You're "thinking" it's over. I'm thinking she's been giving you all the signs that she's not too interested in this role.

Sorry to hear.

First, what is an invitation party? Second, I hope this thread gets you the desired response you're looking for. Good luck.

It's awful that she won't discuss this with you, she should at least give you that. She's not obligated to do these things just because she's your MOH but she should at least talk to you if there's a problem, and even if she can't attend certain events.

What did she say when you talked to her? Was it face to face or text? Because you need to have a heart to heart with her. She may be feeling bad because its not her getting married, or some other something is going on with her. She may need you more than you need her, right now, you never know. Avoid letters and texting and talk on the phone or in person. She's your best friend, you should be able to talk, right?

Chantel - its when you invite some friends, have some wine, and help the bride address the invitations.

It's over. Sorry. You probably should call her and find out what's going on in her life; Mrs Cheapskate nailed it.

Well you can't control how she spends her money. It can be frustrating, but you will have to get over it. There's obviously something going on with her, and booting her out of the wedding party probably didn't help it. You need to talk to her face to face.

Maybe you should have valued your friendship a little more and not let the wedding get in the way of that. You booting her from being your MOH is a friendship ending move. She might have skipped some things and maybe was being a little standoffish but you are the one that ended the friendship if that is in fact what it's come to. Talk to her face to face.

She is not only your MOH, but your best friend, and you couldn't even call her to ask what is going on? Sounds like the friendship may have been dwindling for awhile and you didn't realize it. Its understandable to be upset, but take the time to be a good friend and TALK to her, instead of writing a letter. I'd be pissed if my "best friend" wrote me a letter instead of calling.

Great advise. I didn't boot her out of the wedding. She booted herself. The reason I don't call and instead write a letter is because I get more words out. I live in Nashville and she lives in Knoxville. If we were closer, i'd be able to meet with her. But the fact that she won't reply to any calls I make, makes me think it's done. Although, we are still friends on facebook. What I wrote above is just a smidge of what happened. I keep up with her still and I believe she is under a lot of stress. Trust me, all I want to do is talk to her and help her anyway I can.

This is too bad. I agree a phone call would be better but it seems like you've already tried that. All you can do is keep the "door" open for her friendship. Hopefully she's ok!

How did she boot herself out? If she is under some big time stress, you may be stressing her out more. Make an effort to go see her.

Yeah, there's only so much you can do when you live in different places and someone won't pick up the phone. I'm sorry you're going through this! You thought your best friend would be there at the least emotionally during this time and it's hard when things change.

There is no going to see her if she's not responding to anything from me. She is in the process of moving. I am trying to give her some space. Just very disappointed in the way things have turned out.

Ashley, I am so sorry to hear that. Her being your best friend it is a shame that she isn't more involved in the wedding. Maybe it is really hard for her that you are getting married. maybe she is in love with you and you getting married means she doesn't have a shot? I joke I joke.

but really. sadly friends come and go no matter how close you are. I hope that you enjoy the day of the wedding itself.

My boss said this to me when I had issues with one of my BMS "your goal for the next 6 months is to have the happiest, stress free time of your life. if someone is giving you stress. let them go. be happy and grateful for the people around you now"

I know it is hard. TRUST ME.. here is a picture of a puppy to hopefully make you smile.

Seems as you did try to reach out via calls, texts, etc, etc. Its sad, but you can say you tried. Dont let it get to you, and I wouldnt talk bad about her to mutual friends..she might be pulling away for something not related to you.

This sucks. I would wait till the whole wedding stuff settles down, maybe 6 weeks after and try and ask WTF happened to her. But be prepared for a fight.

From what you have said, it doesn't seem like you've done anything wrong at all. You're right, she booted herself out of the wedding because she acted like she didn't give a shit. I understand that a MOH isn't supposed to do anything other than wear the dress and show up, but she should also act, I don't know, actually excited for you or that your wedding a maybe a big deal. My MOH did the same kind of crap to me. I barely heard anything from her, and every email was stilted and a little negative on her end. I hadn't even asked her to buy a dress yet or spend any money or throw any parties, yet when I finally asked her what was going on she accused me of expecting her to spend a ton of money. We had a huge fight. A lot was said. In the end she dropped out of the wedding altogether, and we aren't friends anymore. The thing is, our friendship had not been in a good place for a little while. So, I have to wonder about the state of your friendship before you asked her to be your MOH. I'm sorry this happened to you, but like my situation, I have to say it sounds like it's for the best!

You guys are amazing. Thank you. I wish things were better but I'm hoping that giving her space to come around will help...maybe. I know if it were me and things got rocky, i was asked to step down, whatever the case may be, I would definitely still be by her side every step no matter what. So the fact that she just doesn't do the same makes me think maybe she is slightly jealous. I'm trying to give her time. She had a totally diffferent upbringing than me and after all this has happened, I look back at our friendship and it kinda seems like it wasn't as "best friends" as I thought. We hung out and rode horses and kept in touch. But we were much closer in HS and I have other friends i'm closer to that would never do that to me. The things that matter are that my fiance and I are getting married - I have to put the stress aside and focus on that for the next week - She's just missing out :/

Lately here, I've felt like the bad guy and my friends and family tell me I shouldn't. I'm just a softy and I really wish I had her to talk to about normal things just to brush this off.