Quitting my job after the wedding

I personally would start looking after the honeymoon because if you start a new job before the wedding, you may not be granted that time odd. I've worked for several companies where they don't allow PTO for the first 3 months or so. I also personally would not put in my notice until I secured an offer elsewhere, but if you two can swing 1 income for an undetermined amount of time, then that matters less. I always feel like it is easier to find a new job when you are currently employed vs when you are unemployed, and depending on the field you're in, the job market may or may not be the best right now.

I agree with Hannah. I wouldn't leave my current job until I've found a new one.
I would also wait until after the honeymoon. Deal with that stress later.

View Quoted Comment I usually wouldn't quit without something new lined up. I'm hoping I don't have to wait too long after the wedding though because I want to enjoy the first months of marriage without being miserable

Sorry you're dealing with this--work culture can be so draining and frustrating.

Depending on what field you're in, I'd probably start looking mid-May. Depending on how short/long the interview processes are in your field, it could actually land you post honeymoon. I'm not sure when in June your wedding is, of course.

Most positions I've had are cool with a start date that's a few weeks out. You don't need to explain things to them, but when they ask you your earliest start date, I'd give them a day past the honeymoon (though, I'm operating under the assumption you're taking your honeymoon right after the wedding and it'll be about a week long, so grain of salt if that's not the case!)

Agreed with Hannah--it's always easier to look for a job when you're currently employed. I've been on both sides of that. With ripple effects of the pandemic, I'd try to hold on a bit longer. Unfortunately, we never know exactly how long the job hunt will take.

I'm in the exact same boat! I've been keeping an eye out for a new position on my own time, but I've kept it very hush hush with my current job. I interviewed for a new job last week, and will know if I got it by the end of the week. If they call me today, I'm handing my boss my notice today. So I think you're totally okay to give them your notice after your wedding. If it were me, I would probably wait until you found something else, but that's between you and your fiancé and you two's financial situation.

I hate this for you!

I'm in a similar situation, but its not so bad working from home and someone who was causing me a lot of stress and headaches moved to a different department so I no longer have to deal with them. I'll be sticking it out until after we are married (I'm the only one working right now so I don't want to change jobs right now) We are planning on moving out of state after my FH finishes school and after we are married.

I'm sorry you have to deal with that, but since your wedding is so close I'd stick it out if you can, if not can you be unemployed until then? I agree its better to get paid, but your health (mental and physical) is important too.

Start looking for jobs ASAP. It's likely you'll need to give a couple weeks minimum notice anyway and often interviewing/hiring will take longer than that. So if your wedding is in June it isn't THAT long to stick it out. Of course this depends on what exactly is toxic and if youre like physically unsafe in any way or something like that. If that's the case get out now.

You know i think it's fine to start looking now. because a lot of places take such a long time to even respond back to candidates anyway

I would definitely start looking now. I would just be upfront during any interviews that you've already pre-booked your honeymoon and let them know what days you'll be gone. Most companies understand that you might have pre-planned events. You might just have to take unpaid time off.

I was in the same boat as you and thought I'd tough it out until after our wedding. I finally couldn't use our wedding as an excuse to stick around any longer (things got that bad) and I turned in my notice the day after getting back from Christmas. You can always start applying/interviewing a few weeks before the wedding. You can definitely ask what their benefits are during your interview and get an idea of when PTO/health insurance would kick in. Some are 30 days, some are 90. I only interviewed with one job (which is my new job) and I told them upfront about our wedding and the time I'd planned off during my interview. It's always good to be upfront and a lot of companies will appreciate you letting them know during the interview process about upcoming time off. Many of them will understand that vacations, surgeries, etc have been scheduled far in advance and if they don't approve of it, then that says a lot about the company lol

As far as turning in your notice after your honeymoon...there's absolutely nothing wrong with you doing that if that's the route you choose. Your company and their relationship with you is a business and nothing more. I would suggest giving a 2 weeks notice just to be courteous and also not to burn bridges. You don't owe them anything more than a resignation, but it looks better on you and there's a chance they may not even make you stay the full 2 weeks! Best of luck you!

I would start looking just before the wedding and interview if possible. Don’t quit until after the wedding. Also don’t turn in your notice until you have a new job lined up. Unless you’re ok with being unemployed temporarily.

Honestly with the job market right now I would start looking immediately. You may be able to find an amazing company that does offer PTO right away, or you could try to negotiate for it as well.

I'm not sure what you do for a living, but when I had to resume the job hunt it took quite sometime to find anything and a lot of people were slow on making their decisions. It can't hurt to tune up the resume and start looking casually. Sometimes having that light at the end of the tunnel can help with the toxic work environment.

I totally understand the toxic workplace and the need to run. I agree with everyone else - start job hunting now and wait until you have another job before quitting. I literally cried when I got my new job offer and quit the next day (gave two weeks, worked most of it.) I think it took two months for me to find a good job that I wanted and another month to actually start the job. It highly depends on what you are looking for and the industry. I did meditation everyday to deal with the stress of being in a toxic workplace.

I would wait until after the honeymoon for the same reason your FH mentioned. You don’t want to have to build up that PTO again or have to struggle taking off of work at a new job. I’m sorry that your job environment is so toxic, and I totally understand not wanting to have to stay there any longer than you have to

I would start looking now but also tell any potential employer you interview with that your start date would have to be after you get back from your honeymoon. Most will ask how soon you would be able to start if they are interested in hiring you. That way, if you do get a new job before you get married, you can relax over your honeymoon without worrying about finding a new job or returning to your old one.

Didn’t you previously post that your employer generously gifted you additional PTO for your honeymoon? If so, I would definitely quit before using his gift. Otherwise, decline the gifted PTO.

Ouch. I definitely think it would be personally and professionally rude to take that PTO that was gifted and quit after.

View Quoted Comment Yes this is true but I decided to decline it and only take 1 week. I think my employer is trying to make up for the toxic environment by giving me a generous vacation

If you decline it then I say take the PTO and quit when you return. There are a lot of available jobs right now, so depending on your line of work there should be something available. I’d recommend really playing through how you will explain leaving prior to finding something else during interviews because it doesn’t sit well with most hiring managers (toxic work environment may be true, but they don’t like to hear that.) I would even start applying before your wedding so maybe you can have something lined up for when you return. Accept a job and plan to start after wedding.

View Quoted Comment

Yes, I am taking my honeymoon right after the wedding. And FH and I could survive on his salary for probably 6 months, but I would prefer to have us both working if possible. I just am at my wits end with this job. I'm going to start looking around on the side for other jobs