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Beginner May 2022

Question About Bridesmaid Gifts

Olivia, on May 19, 2021 at 10:07 AM Posted in Etiquette and Advice 2 15
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Hi Everyone! I have a question about bridesmaid gifts that I was hoping to get some advice on. As a gift to my bridesmaids, I have purchased each of their bridesmaid dresses (I went with each of them individually and had them pick out their dress, as I wanted each to wear one they feel beautiful and comfortable in), and decided to pay for them each to get their hair done on the day of the wedding. Since the dress and hair services are meant to be the bridesmaid gift in lieu of a more traditional gift, I was planning on just giving them each a handwritten card on the day of the wedding.

Do you think this is enough, or do you think it's a mistake to not give them a physical gift on the day of the wedding? I want to make sure they each feel valued and appreciated, so any advice or guidance would be so helpful. Thank you in advance!

15 Comments

Latest activity by Tina, on May 19, 2021 at 4:21 PM
  • Lisa
    Rockstar July 2022
    Lisa Online ·
    • Flag
    I think it's totally up to you! I love the idea of a handwritten card. Personally, I would try to avoid having everything be wedding-related (dresses, robes, etc) as their gift, and would instead shop for them as if it's their birthday or Christmas: what are their hobbies/interests? What things do you think they'd like? It doesn't necessarily have to be a physical gift, but you could be something such as treating them to a spa day, or out to dinner at their favorite restaurant. Since you've already bought their dresses and are paying for their hair to be done, you could just give them something small (such as a framed photo of you and them) along with the thank you note? I'm sure they will appreciate whatever you decide to do!
    • Reply
  • AJ
    Super October 2022
    AJ ·
    • Flag

    That is very generous of you, I would get them something small with a nice handwritten note instead of something lavish

    • Reply
  • Gbees4121
    Dedicated October 2021
    Gbees4121 ·
    • Flag
    I think that's a wonderful gift Smiley smile dresses and hair are expensive enough! What would you get them if you did get a physical gift too?
    • Reply
  • themost
    Dedicated October 2021
    themost ·
    • Flag
    Honestly, I could care less about any sort of bridesmaid gifts I've received. I've got engraved flasks and glassware/tumblers, personalized little trinkets, etc. A handwritten note would be awesome. If you want to add a little something more, a framed picture of you together from aunt other point in your friendship would be nice.
    • Reply
  • Alexa
    Dedicated October 2022
    Alexa ·
    • Flag
    I think buying their dress & paying for their hair is more than enough! That is extremely generous & thoughtful of you ☺️ I personally LOVE handwritten notes, and I think that is something they would cherish. If you do plan on getting them something else, I agree with the others - don’t buy anything they can’t use again (i.e. anything with “bridesmaid” on it, etc.); you’ll just be wasting your money!
    • Reply
  • L
    Lady ·
    • Flag

    This is totally fine! If you'd like to include a gift, I would do something small like a $10 starbucks or Target gift card for each girl in the nice note you're giving them. But not necessary in my opinion.

    • Reply
  • E
    Super July 2023
    Eniale ·
    • Flag

    Honestly, I think just a card is plenty.

    Buying their dresses and paying for their hair isn't really a gift. That doesn't mean it isn't generous, just that usually a gift is something that they will enjoy that doesn't have to do with your wedding. You aren't giving them the dress because they like it, you're giving them the dress so they can be in your wedding.

    That said, I don't think you are obligated to get your bridesmaids gifts in the first place. A heartfelt card is plenty. If you are worried they also won't consider the dresses a gift and will feel shafted (they shouldn't), you could do something very small like a nice candle or bath bomb set or something. But I would not get anything elaborate.

    • Reply
  • Cool
    Super July 2020
    Cool ·
    • Flag
    I don’t think bridesmaids gifts are necessary. That said, I also don’t view the HMU and dresses as a gift as it’s not something they would have wanted otherwise. A handwritten card is fine.
    • Reply
  • Michelle
    Rockstar October 2022
    Michelle Online ·
    • Flag

    Get a small gift that is related to their personal interests that is not wedding related and doesn’t have have names/date/titles that they will enjoy long after the wedding, plus a heartfelt card. While it is generous to pay for the dress, it’s not a gift to them that they can reuse.

    Stay away from jewelry, robes, flasks, pjs, anything marketed as a bridesmaid gift. Shop like it’s their birthday.

    • Reply
  • C
    Savvy July 2021
    Charlotte ·
    • Flag
    I think the dresses and hair service are plenty!! You don’t really need to add anything else with the handwritten card honestly, but if you can afford it and want to splurge on them, go for it😊.
    • Reply
  • Catherine
    Expert March 2023
    Catherine ·
    • Flag
    I think a handwritten card is a great idea. Maybe some small something that’s unique to them. I don’t view their dresses or their hair and makeup as a gift though. It’s incredibly kind for you to do that! But it’s not a gift for them to keep, as they wouldn’t have picked out those dresses unless they were in your wedding in the first place.
    • Reply
  • Michelle
    Rockstar October 2022
    Michelle Online ·
    • Flag
    View Quoted Comment

    Agree with this

    • Reply
  • Sarah
    Savvy August 2021
    Sarah ·
    • Flag

    I actually disagree with people who are saying the dress and hair services doesn't count as a gift. I think it absolutely does! If I were a bridesmaid and the bride were paying for my dress and hair, it would mean so much to me and I would absolutely consider that gesture a gift. Especially since it sounds like you let them each pick out their own dress and they won't have to pay anything to be in your wedding. In fact, I would prefer this over a smaller physical gift that I may or may not use or have picked out myself. Yes, they wouldn't pick out a bridesmaid dress if they weren't in your wedding, but if you weren't paying for it, they would be buying one anyways and be out a couple hundred dollars. Saving that amount for them is a tremendous gift, especially for those of us who struggle financially. I think a handwritten card is a beautiful touch and wouldn't get any more than that!

    • Reply
  • Sarah
    Savvy August 2021
    Sarah ·
    • Flag
    View Quoted Comment

    I agree with this!

    • Reply
  • T
    Devoted August 2020
    Tina ·
    • Flag
    Honestly if you paid for my dress and my hair that’s plenty for me. And a handwritten card just is like a cherry on top.


    I think that’s a good enough gift for them.
    If you feel like it’s not enough for some reason (being a bridesmaid/maid of honor is an honor itself) maybe a small gift card or a small gift like a bracelet or something. I don’t really think it’s necessary in my opinion. Dress can be reused for a party or something like that. My MoH picked her dress cost like $30 or so can be used again for another party.
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