Public Speaking Issues

Is there a different bridesmaid who would be willing to give the speech instead? Or maybe your bridesmaids and MOH can all work together on a speech, and either have one person read it, or each person reads just a small portion of it? Or, just completely skip the MOH speech if she doesn't feel comfortable.

She can always do a video or voice recording of herself giving a speech/toast. and play it at the wedding.

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The issue is that she feels obligated to make a toast, so I need to find an alternative she'd be comfortable with. Maybe another in the wedding party could it, I'll have to ask.

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Good idea!

If she is that terrified, don’t put her in a position where she will be uncomfortable. Toasts and other public speaking are optional. Ask if a different bridesmaid wants to give a toast at the rehearsal dinner, but don’t force it on anyone. Make it clear that the only obligation she has is to relax and have fun.

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I know her well enough to know she'll want to do something, which is why I'm looking for alternatives. I think I'll take Janet's suggestion if my MOH is okay with it.

I would suggest not putting that on her plate at all. I’d just skip it. She’ll be involved enough that she likely won’t miss doing that.

Another bridesmaid? My sister is the same way so I’m having my bridesmaid do it instead

Either have someone else do it, or there are plenty of 2-4 sentence quick toasts online if she would rather do something short and prewritten. Additionally, she could stay at her table with the microphone instead of going up front. It really depends on how she feels!

Telling her you completely understand that aren't expecting her to give a toast, and meaning it (!!), is so much better than trying to come up with some alternative that she still wouldn't be happy with. Plenty of wedding party members don't give speeches for a variety of reasons, and it's totally fine. No one will miss it; everybody wins.

Maybe she could make a collage of picture memories with you or write how she feels and display it at the rehersal dinner. You could give her free rain to a creative side that's less verbal.

I like the idea from Amy and Justin. She could make a power point putting pictures and words on it and just let it run through with something at the end saying let's toast or something like that. Power points these days are amazing and can have music and all kinds of cool flow ins and outs and everything .

A joint speech with 1 (or more) girls?

Could she do a toast at a more intimate event like a bridal shower?

I would assure her that a toast is not necessary or expected. No one will miss it.

Would she feel comfortable making a toast in the bridal suite after you got married? That way only the bridal party will be there. Might be less intimidating for her.