Pros and cons of a seating chart

@missM if you aren't doing alcohol, you should do a seating chart..... I know I need some drinks in me to dance so if I'm going to be sitting soberly I'd at least like to know the people at my table.

@OP i would most definitely do a seating chart or assign tables for that many people. even if most people know each other it's nicer to walk in somewhere with a million people and be able to go right to a seat instead of a free for all trying to find spots next to your favorite guests.

Went to a wedding last weekend with FH, that didn't have a seating chart and we didn't know anybody other than a groomsman and the groom so we just ended up at a huge table by ourselves. Still had fun but it might have been nice to get to know some of the family or friends.

I love that the ONLY post saying that you don't need one is from some random one star saying that she didn't have one and absolutely nothing happened. Yet, the wedding date she has is for 2017 and she is speaking past tense.

I agree with PP -Seating chart is the way to go!

No seating chart with that many people is a clusterf*ck waiting to happen.

We went to one wedding that was like that, it caused some stress especially since the kids of the family were far from the parents.

And PLEASE avoid 'cute' or 'unique' in favor of 'legible'. I went to a wedding where names were written on packets of seeds (it was in a barn), then each table corresponded to your seed packet. BUT, just cause you finally found your frickin' packet and know you're 'peas' doesn't tell you where that table it. Is it next to corn or wheat? Another wedding had the chart written on glass. Beautiful in the sunlight, illegible when they brought it inside and laid it down on black material. Another wedding just had a piece of white paper glued to posterboard. completely legible, the tables were numbered-- finding my seat was no problem at all.

@ajpeacockk also, be sure to sit all the vegetarians together so they can console themselves on how the entire reception is two kinds of street cart tacos.

It depends on if you're having a plated dinner or a reception/buffet style dinner. If it's plated then I would say yes since everyone has to sit through a meal together. If it's reception/buffet style then people are going to be getting up to get food, mingling, and it's not necessary. If you're not going to make a seating chart for either scenario, at least make sure you put "reserved" signs on a table for your parents, grandparents, etc. I went to a wedding with no seating chart where we had to ask the bride's college friends to move so the mother of the groom could have a seat which was super awkward.

I would strongly disagree that you don't need a chart for a Buffett. So every time I get up to get something I should take me purse in case someone wants my seat? How about my utensils? Or am I expected to find another seat and just use the utensils someone else has already used? Ridiculous. Let people have the same seat while they enjoy your hospitality and don't create stress for your guests by turning it into a death match for seating.

@PP YAS i am having a buffet style dinner and there will most definitely be a seating chart. the wedding I was at without a seating chart was buffet and someone took my seat whenever I moved to mingle. Irritating AF. Just do one seriously I literally do not understand why someone wouldn't...

You need a seat chart, period.

I was debating this too, and will also have a huge amount of people like you. I think we're going with a seating chart lol.

I did not have a seating chart and everything was perfect. Just depends on your theme, guests, and type of wedding you're having.

Most people here will tell you that you're an idiot for not having one, but it was the best thing for our reception. I wouldn't have changed it one bit.

I think this really depends on you and your fiance. In my case, I'm expecting about 160, of very disparate families. I am reserving tables near the front for family, but not assigning any seats or tables other than that. I have anxiety and depression issues, on top of worsening chronic physical illnesses, and I know the task of doing a seating chart would fall all to me - I'm the better people person. But I also know that the stress of trying to make a seating chart and making it perfect so nobody gets ticked off will drive me back to self harm.

I think that a seating chart sounds like a good idea if that kind of task is doable for you - it's a courtesy and it makes things marginally easier for your guests. But in some people's cases (like mine), you're looking at days of severe mental stress and anguish on the bride's end to stop ten seconds of awkwardness for the guests while they look for somewhere to sit. Most weddings I've been to have not had seating charts, and it's honestly not been an issue. At most you eat dinner for 20 minutes to a half hour around people you don't click with, then you go off and find people you're friends with.

If it's going to be an unforgivable faux pas for me to nix a task to try to keep myself out of the psych ward again, I'm not sure what to tell people.