Problems with future in laws

This surely can’t be the first issue that you’ve had with them. People don’t go from perfectly fine to not inviting you to big family events. Do you know where this is all stemming from? Is your FH standing up for you? I wouldn’t even attend an event where my future spouse wasn’t welcome.

No...this is the second event in 5 weeks...the other was a funeral they didn't want me at...honestly I see them once a year & do not talk to them...I feel they must be influenced by someone else's opinion...& am just as confused about this

Really sorry for what you are going through. What is FH doing or saying about this?

Please make sure FH knows how much this hurts your feelings! If he chooses to not defend you and tolerates you being excluded, that's a serious issue!

There's no way I would attend something my finace was not welcome at !

So far he has said it is not right...& he doesn't expect me to be ok with it...but that he feels there is nothing he can do with it being the grandmother of his children

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That shouldn't matter. He is marrying you and should stick up for you.

View Quoted Comment I’m sorry, but what?! Who cares if she’s the grandmother of his children? You’re about to be his wife. I think you both need to discuss boundaries and maybe counseling. My parents are the grandparents of my daughter (from a previous relationship) but there is no way I would allow them to disrespect FH and continue having a relationship with them.

FH needs to step up for you. You guys are getting married, this isn't some kind of fling. My family HATES my SIL and FH's family hates his BIL. We are still cordial, they are all still invited to all family events. We, as a family, understand that this is not our choice and not our lives and we need to respect their (my brother, his sister's) choices. I can understand not liking someone, but not inviting them/being cordial at this stage in a relationship is unacceptable.... we are all adults and it sounds like they need to start acting like it.

I am very sorry. Hopefully things will get better. I am guessing this is not really about you, but about anyone that your FH marries. I suspect that they are mad at him for getting divorced. Hopefully over time, this will get better.

Probably is that they just don't want him to get married...his ex wife cheated on him & had someone else's baby...& let him believe it was his...that is why they are now divorced

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You might want to consider that men who say their wife cheated on them are not uncommon. Strange that his family does not support him more.

I know his ex wife she told me the story...it was a big ordeal...but she is now married to the baby daddy...& they did have a DNA test

I don't understand what his ex wife would have to do with his family not liking you. That doesn't make any sense. It's one thing for them to be worried for him and concerned he might end up in another bad relationship but to just hate you and not invite you to anything...something doesn't add up