Private Ceremony, Informing Extended Family, and Social Media

I've already been to a few weddings where the bride and groom asked everyone to not post until they did, and it's completely reasonable! They key is just getting ahead of it and reminding the ones who are invited how special they are for being let into the "inner circle" and ask them to refrain until you all say it's ok!!

Agreed. I am asking my guest not to take pictures due to request of my photographer. Praying all goes well

That's why you should change your settings so you can approve your tags. I don't think there's anything wrong with asking people not to post your wedding or any details on social media.

But I want to know: you're sending professional pictures to family that weren't invited to the wedding? Why?

Thanks everyone.

@Gymrat, I am sending a postcard like announcement with a professional picture from the ceremony similar to this one. My tag requests setting is already enabled. That still doesn't really matter if they post (even without tagging me) because mutual friends and family will see.

Your friend was very rude and out of line to post that. She has clearly never planned a wedding and had to deal with people asking "where is my invite". She made lots of people have hurt feelings I'm sure!

That being said, I did a family only wedding and a handful of very close friends (lifelong friends). We did an unplugged wedding, for one reason....to limit people feeling hurt they weren't invited. Also, I don't have any social media. (I used to, but got rid of it all about three years ago. It saves so much trouble in general!!!!) I'd refrain from putting anything on social media. Like, literally post nothing. Ask others to do the same, and explain you're dealing with a lot of hurt feelings due to the nature of the intimate ceremony. Also, change your Facebook settings so that you have to approve everything you are tagged in before it will show up on your wall. I used to have mine set that way. (I went on a cruise, posted nothing about it online due to not wanting my house getting broken into, and I had to call in to work one day to travel. My neice literally posted "So excited to house sit for K&D! Have fun on your 7 day cruise to Jamaica!" I was so pissed. I called her immediately, asked her to take it down. When I explained I was calling in, she was like "OHHH!!!")

Anyways, less is more. You can send a sweet "we were married in a very private ceremony on 1/1/14 and here is my new last name and address" and include one good picture.

This was the post and passive aggressive message that followed :-/

People are outrageous. I could never imagine asking someone where my wedding invite was, especially like that!! Definitely ask others to not post yet and change your FB settings

Formal wedding announcements are supposed to be sent out right away - like the day after the wedding - not 3-4 months later. That is too long.

@Emily 3-4 weeks. Not months. Note taken though.