Hi Erin! We began premarital counseling with our Presbyterian minister with the expectations we would discuss if we were in agreement on if we wanted kids, financial similarities, religious views, etc. I rather enjoyed it! When covid hit, we called the minister to ask if we can finish our meetings over the phone. He was so sweet, he said “you have been quarantined together for months, postponed your wedding date and you still want to get married?” We said “yes of course!” He sweetly said “I think you will be just fine and have enough on your plates”. We didn’t technically finish, but the ones we did were actually very good. Hope this helps ❤️
We did precana while trying to be approved for DH's Catholic church.
That went poorly, and half of that was because I thought it was relationship BASICS, for like... dating. As in, the overwhelming majority of it was stuff DH and I had worked through, like proper adults, YEARS before. Part of it even freaked DH out because, "we don't discuss religion!" Me: "Well, I'm *not Christian, nor religious, so I have *nothing to say*". DH: "...oh, right." (Bonus for them knowing at least 2 of us there weren't Catholic, but deliberately refusing to explain ANY of the religious stuff.) ...Yes, I'm still super salty about it, and it's been almost 2 years.
On the flip side, we did couples counseling BEFORE that, and I highly recommend. Much more tailored to your unique relationship, can be as short or as long as you like, and done by a qualified and licensed professional.
We were in a fairly good place before counseling, but it really helped us strengthen our communication, foresee trouble spots, and create tools to avoid them.
