Pregnant Moh, thoughts on having co-moh

I don’t have kids but I feel like it could still happen. I’m in a bridal party now and the co MOH has kids and she was fine with everything and attended everything and helped plan it all. But I do understand it can be difficult cause I know it was challenging for her at times.


I had two MOHs at my wedding and I don’t find anything wrong with that.

I think that having two maids of honor is fine. I don't think that adding a second maid of honor after the fact, because you're worried the original won't be able to throw you parties, is fine. Super disrespectful to the new MOH who is essentially getting a promotion because you want her to host events for you, and equally disrespectful to the MOH that you're pretty much replacing because she's having a baby.

I wouldn't have a second MOH especially since she wasn't chosen to begin with and you are only choosing her now because of the circumstances surrounding the other MOH.

Have you talked to her to see how she feels about it? Have you expressed your expectations for her as being your MOH?

My Matron of Honor found out she was pregnant, with twins, while we planned for my wedding. She also has 2 other children, 1 being 2 years old. Not only did she plan the best surprise bachelorette party weekend, my bridal shower was just as awesome. She made it to multiple dress appointments with me, while attending to her own dress which now included getting it altered, and she even helped me make over 50 gift bags for out of town guests.


On my wedding day she was amazing! Numerous people came up to me telling me how they saw her doing such a great job attending to me throughout the day. She was more than capable of being my Matron of Honor, pregnant or not❤️
Simply have a talk with your Maid of Honor if you have any concerns.

I think whoever gets “promoted” into MOH will be offended, and your current MOH will be offended. Why cant your bridesmaids plan and host your events? Theres no hard and fast rule that says it has to be the MOH or that you cant help. People also just shouldnt be expected to plan when to start their families around other peoples weddings

You should pick your MOH based on relationship, not based on what events she can attend or what she can do for you. I'd be incredibly hurt if a friend replaced me because I had a baby and my priorities had to change. Plus, there is no rule that says the MOH has to host or plan your shower and/or bachelorette parties. Anyone can do this, including family and other bridesmaids.

I also agree with not "promoting" the other bridesmaid, IMO it seems like its a slap in the face and that she's doing something wrong because she's pregnant, and I don't think that's how you feel but that's kind of how it comes across. And I also agree with talking to your MOH, see how she is feeling and if she is okay with everything or if she needs help from the other bridesmaids she should just ask them, all of my girls are in communication with my MOH for the extra activities, so you MOH doesn't or shouldn't have to do it alone, she has girls to help her if she needs or wants it.

Don’t overthink the titles, they’re just that. And they will let you know on their own time what they can or can’t do.

I have two MOHs, both have kids and one is currently pregnant (total surprise to all of us, but here we are lol), not once did I ever have to question whether they'd be able/willing to do anything since they pretty much do everything else. If they can't do something, they'll tell me, but they want to take on more responsibilities (esp. since their own kids are in my wedding as well).

For your MOH, it's best not to assume she won't be able to or doesn't want to do certain things pertaining to the wedding. If you're a bit concerned, talk to her one on one & see how she's doing. If she expresses that things are a bit harder, bring up the topic of having a co-MOH, but don't push it on her if she feels she can do it. No matter what position someone is given, they'll help to their fullest & what you allow them to do. Someone being pregnant doesn't make them incapable of handling MOH duties though, my own MOH is doing everything she did before pregnancy, it's not a big deal for me.

If your MOH wants to host/attend these events and hasn’t expressed any concerns, I wouldn’t worry too much. Having a baby does not incapacitate a woman or impair her abilities to do everyday things like attending a wedding, however as you would appreciate, she will definitely have more things on her plate. She will likely need to hire a babysitter/rely on family if she isn’t bringing the baby and might be a little bit emotional about being away from her newborn as you could expect. I would have a heart to heart with her, if you are concerned, but not with regard to wedding, but instead from the perspective that you want to check up on how she’s feeling about her new life going forward as a mum.

I don’t know why you would need a co-MOH except for purely because you wanted 2 because you couldn’t decide and I agree that this might offend her. Just remember, your MOH isn’t obligated to have any duties, anything she undertakes should be solely voluntary.