Mari
Beginner October 2022

Pre-marital Counseling?

Mari, on October 22, 2021 at 2:00 PM Posted in Community Conversations 0 9
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Hey friends!


So, among the other 8,382 things to think about when it comes to wedding planning and being married, what does everyone think about pre-marital counseling? FH and I hardly ever argue and are both pretty good at communicating to each other, but I still feel like we could benefit from taking a course or meeting with a counselor to develop ways to cope with issues that we haven't faced yet. FH does not see the need for any type of pre-marital counseling, but he is willing to do it if it's important to me... Thoughts?


We've been living together for the past year and a half, and bought a home together about 3 months ago, so none of that is new; BUT there will be other things that change after marriage like joint accounts, kids, parent dynamics, etc... I just want to make sure we both know how to navigate those situations and are able to maintain strong and productive communication with each other. I come from divorced parents and FH does not, so I'm thinking this might be affecting both of our perspectives on this as well.

9 Comments

Latest activity by Melinda, on October 25, 2021 at 2:35 PM
  • Lisa
    Rockstar July 2022
    Lisa Online ·
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    I think pre-marital counseling can be beneficial for everyone, regardless of how well you communicate! It allows you both to sit down with a third party and have deep conversations about marriage expectations, children, splitting time between your families, finances, etc. It'll help make sure that you stay on the same page.
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  • Mari
    Beginner October 2022
    Mari ·
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    That's kind of what I'm thinking as well. At the very least, we'll be able to establish expectations like you said. It certainly can't hurt, right?

    Did you take a course online/with a counselor or go the more traditional route with religious counseling?

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  • Lisa
    Rockstar July 2022
    Lisa Online ·
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    Certainly can't hurt! We met with a counselor in person for a few sessions. Similar to you and your FH, my fiance and I don't argue often, and we have great communication between us. My fiance didn't think we needed the counseling for those reasons, but afterwards, he said he found it helpful. We discussed a lot of topics and went more in-depth on some of them. Some conversations were more difficult than others, but overall, I felt like we came out of the sessions understanding each other even more.
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  • Mari
    Beginner October 2022
    Mari ·
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    I love this! Looks like we are in a similar boat to how you guys started out. I think we're going to move forward on it - we can only come out the other end stronger. Thank you!

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  • Cool
    Super July 2020
    Cool ·
    • Flag
    Since you’re both open to it, there’s no harm. Either you walk away with helpful tools or you waste an hour of your time.
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  • Sharonda
    Rockstar January 2021
    Sharonda ·
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    My husband and I rarely argue, and we took an online premarital course before our wedding - primarily because we were long distance. We enjoyed it and it prompted us to talk about issues that had not come up, but definitely may at some point. We went at our own pace and took advantage of each lesson.


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  • Janae
    Devoted September 2021
    Janae ·
    • Flag

    So glad you are asking this question!!

    My parents got us pre-marital counseling as a wedding gift and we are still talking about how helpful it was for us!! It was only $35 for an assessment and 4 sessions. We were long-distance for most of our engagement so we did the sessions virtually, but I think there is an option to do them in person.

    Here is the link: https://www.symbis.com/

    DM me if you have any questions, I'd love to share our experience. It certainly opened our eyes to things we didn't know about each other, and even ourselves!!

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  • Fiona
    Expert May 2024
    Fiona ·
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    I think it is a great idea as you talk about things you might not have thought about before and can help you discover new things about each other. It's great that you already communicate well Smiley smile

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  • Melinda
    Devoted March 2022
    Melinda ·
    • Flag

    My Fiance and I are doing premarital counseling and have had a positive experience so far. It is a bit pricey $150 a session but I feel like it will be worth it in the end.

    I come from a background of trauma and hes military so we both like to keep ourselves and our relationship constantly in check. This is just another way of learning how to better communicate.

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