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Just Said Yes April 2021

Pre-ceremony cocktail hour

Sarah, on May 5, 2020 at 1:52 PM Posted in Etiquette and Advice 0 8
I am a 2020 brides postponing the wedding so April 2021. A Saturday night wedding is very important to me and for a Jewish wedding the ceremony has to start after sundown. In April sundown is at 8:30. I am concerned with how late it will start and do not want people eating dinner at 11pm. I am thinking of having cocktail hour before the ceremony so people can eat earlier and the event can get started earlier. I don’t mind missing out in the cocktail hour, but the kettubah signing would have to be during this time as well and I feel bad having my family and bridal party miss out on the cocktail hour. Do you think it’s okay to have the cocktail go longer than an hour so everyone can have time to enjoy it too? I’m thinking because we are starting with this part, people will be trickling in at different times. What do you think?

8 Comments

Latest activity by Jana, on May 8, 2020 at 11:57 PM
  • Caytlyn
    Legend November 2019
    Caytlyn ·
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    I wouldn’t offer a full meal and would just have a cake and punch reception or serve appetizers because of the late start time.
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  • M
    VIP January 2019
    Maggie ·
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    The one traditional Jewish wedding I have been to, there was a cocktail hour with heavy appetizers for the kabbalat panim. Then there was all the ceremonial stuff, followed by the more modern tradition of cocktail hour (with lighter snacks since there had been heavier fare before) as time for bridal party photos. Then grand entrance and hora/first dances. And finally, dinner.

    This was a Saturday night in February (so sundown was earlier) and it started after sundown, but I think all the guests felt taken care of and not starving for dinner.

    For your later start time, I think that's all fine except save all the dancing for after dinner.

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  • Fleur
    October 2020
    Fleur ·
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    I think your plan sounds totally fine. You are a Corona bride so your guests will totally get it. Plus, it's Saturday night! People can enjoy the festivities and then sleep in. Good luck!

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  • Michelle
    Devoted November 2022
    Michelle ·
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    I hear you about having such a late start to be after sundown which is why we are doing Sunday afternoon instead. I have definitely been to a Jewish wedding which had food and drink before the ceremony. I am not sure what you are planning for your ketubah ceremony, but I think it usually only takes about 20 min. So your ketubah ceremony is located close to the cocktail hour it won't take away too much time from the festivities.

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  • Lena
    Devoted May 2021
    Lena ·
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    We always wanted a formal evening wedding. We're getting married at 7pm and doing dinner around 9pm after cocktail hour. Yes its a bit late but its also a Saturday wedding so I'm not worried about it. Smiley smile

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  • H
    Master July 2019
    Hannah ·
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    Do your guests follow shabbat? Aside from the ones who happen to live walking distance, I'm not sure how they would get to the ceremony space before sundown. Also, I agree with Caytlyn, I wouldn't do a full meal that late. I would maybe just do a cocktail style reception with heavy appetizers. As a guest, I will probably have eaten dinner before your 8:30pm wedding.
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  • Jennifer
    VIP August 2021
    Jennifer ·
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    You can definitely do cocktail hour first! I'm sure your guests will appreciate not having to wait until 9 to eat appetizers. As far as your family and bridal party, ask your venue/caterer if they can have a small portion of cocktail food (even just cheese and crackers!) sent to the bridal suite so your party can eat while finishing getting ready!

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  • J
    Master October 2022
    Jana ·
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    Very few people will want to eat a full meal at 11pm. Just serve heavy appetizers and desserts.

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