For those of you including the points of specifying kids or no kids, how are you wording that so it doesn’t sound rude? Some of our close friends just had babies and we think they should be allowed to bring their kids, but not everyone. I’ll specify on the invite card by only putting the parents names, but how do you politely tell people they can’t bring their kids? (There’s not enough room on the guest list for everyone to bring kids)
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We did this:
Can I bring my children?
We love ALL of your children, however, we have decided that only the chidlren in the wedding will be attending our celebration. We hope you understand!
We won't be having any kids in our wedding, but I put "Children included with your online RSVP are welcome to attend. Unfortunately, due to there still being uncertainty around COVID, we are limiting the number of children invited to our wedding." I wanted to say something a little nicer, but after the 4th or 5th time someone told my family/my FH's family "I'm going to bring my kids even if they don't want them there/if their neices and nephews are invited, then I should be able to bring my kids/etc.", I was done trying to sugar-coat anything. haha
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The Rules of No Children Allowed Weddings
Be consistent - the rule has to apply to every guest. The only acceptable exceptions are children of immediate family and/or of your bridesmaids and ushers, and/or any page boys and flower girls, so long as you let other guests know.
Don't be upset if parents can't attend. You are perfectly justified in having a child-free wedding; they are perfectly justified in not attending if it's inconvenient or they don't want to be away from their children.
Don't let anyone guilt-trip you about your adults-only policy.
Accept that some parents may need to leave early.
If you're having a destination wedding, you may want to reconsider the kid-free policy - it will be more difficult for parents to travel abroad without their children, or find childcare in another country.
It's a lovely gesture if you want to pay for a creche/professional babysitters, but it's not obligatory.
If you are particularly close to any friends' or family's children, it's a nice idea to include a personal note with the invitations to reiterate that you're sorry not to include them.