Postponing wedding

I'm sorry....yes, it is very overwhelming planning a wedding as it all adds up so fast!! We're keeping our guest list to only very close family and friends for this reason (we are paying) and even doing that is has added up to alot more than we expected but we can make it work w out going into debt (though had discussed eloping earlier in planning stages but ultimately chose to stick to original plan) but If you know you can't afford it, you'll need to postpone and hopefully you only invited people who know and love you so would understand? You can send out an email (or calls) explaining and maybe have a very small intimate (immediate family only) ceremony with a nice dinner after (as marrying you love is the most important thing as you said) then later down road when you can afford.....have a big fancy reception with a huge guest list you originally planned but can't afford to properly host right now. I hope it all works out. :+)

You're definitely looking at the bigger picture and not getting carried away by impulses. You're right, it is never a good idea to go into debt over a big party. But by postponing, you can still have your dream wedding if you postpone it and manage the inevitable expenses, no?

I wouldn't think twice if I received notification of postponement, especially if I knew the situation changed for the couple in question. I'd take my hat off to the couple for looking at the bigger picture and organizing their lives in a mature way.

At the same time, I can understand this hurts right now... hugs to you. You'll make it work out beautifully, you'll see! xx

I think you are so very wise. You are going to have a great marriage for having value for the truly important things. You have a dream for a wedding with the maturity to not start in debt. I would be just fine to receive a notice of postponement. Only if guests have already purchased airfare should it be any issue at all. At the end of the day it's your day and you should make you happy. I congratulate and commend you.

You're making a great decision by putting your financial well-being before the wedding! As a guest, I would not look down on a couple for postponing. Especially if I knew about the new job! There is no shame in postponing!

Have you tried to work a second job or pick up some baby/dog sitting to make some extra money?

I'm in the same boat. I had to push my wedding back six months in order to afford it. It definitely sucked at first because I definitely wanna be married sooner rather than later, but knowing at the end I'll have the wedding I really want and I'll be able to afford it is comforting.

Good luck! Just call the people you sent STD to and explain the situation. Everyone will understand.

Thank you ladies, I appreciate your opinions!

I wouldn't be angry, surprised, anything if I received notice of a postponement life happens! I would think at least the couple is being smart financially!

Hopefully, you sent STDs to only your VIPs. Can you cut your guest list (cut only those people who did not receive a STD) and keep your original date?

We are trying to save for a house, honeymoon and wedding and are just prioritizing because it's all getting too expensive. I had a $1100 dress I loved on layaway but I found a really Awesome dress for $175. I'm going with the $175 dress it's going to be just as special. Originally we were doing a big evening wedding as we ultimately just wanted a party but we are now having a brunch with mimosas and kahlua iced coffees and donuts which is saving THOUSANDS btw then going out with some people later. We also won't need a dj for that and will just be doing donuts and maybe a small cake for cutting. It'll still be AWESOME but it's scaled back. With those changes we're at $8000 with everything instead of the previous $14000.

I totally agree with not going into debt. It was either postponing for us or making some changes. A lot of WW users are having 2 or 3 year engagements so that they can save more.

We originally wanted to get married in march 2017 (engaged in feb 2016), however once we started looking at pricing (we are paying for it) that had a HUGE factor in pushing it back to June 2018. That'll give us a 28 month engagement. Honestly best decision we ever made. It sucks bc I just wanna be married now.

I'm with the others- you are making the best decision. Just be sure to check with any vendors you've already booked to ensure you are able to push it back

I would totally understand now that I've planned a wedding and have gotten married. We did something similar. We picked a date, even let close family and friends know the date. We booked a venue, DOC, and photographer but, decided to push it back 4 months. We did it for personal reasons in addition to finances as getting married in Florida in June was very expensive.

Although we ended up pushing the wedding back another year, this time to work through if getting married was what we wanted to do at all. Fortunately I can say we actually did get married and have been happily married now for almost 6 months.

Don't go into debt for your wedding. Especially if you can help it and it's only a few months later.

Situations change, and if I heard a friend or relative was postponing because their financial situation has changed in would have more respect for that than if I found out they struggled to pay for it or took out loans. It's not worth getting into an even worse financial situation and taking longer to recover from it to keep the original day. I'm sure everyone will be understanding and still be looking forward to the wedding whenever you move it!

Postponing is hard but sometimes it's in your best interest. Don't feel bad or care about what others may think, it's about you and your FH.

We've had to change dates which I ended up changing everything I planned like 3 times, colors, guest count, venues, etc... & actually changing/postponing ended up working in our favor financially & I feel a lot better about the overall wedding. I found a better venue, I've gotten better discounts, found better vendors, chose a beautiful theme/colors & we are extremely happy with our decision.

Ha! I'm in the exact same position. I was actually about to post about this.

We are in the process of getting a house and there are so many expenses, that we have decided to pospone. We will be having a wedding in the fall instead. And though I do feel a little bummed about it I feel very optimistic and positive that this is going to save us from alot of stress and possibly debt and since we are only inviting close family and friends I know that they will understand.

Hang in there and be positive. I think it's very mature to be able to make this decision when needed.