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Beginner October 2023

Pointless Stress

Courtney, on October 10, 2022 at 10:34 AM Posted in Planning 0 10

Hello! I'm a little over a year out from the wedding! I wanted to get some advice on things that you hell stressed over only to look back on and be like "wow, I didn't need to worry about that".

I've gotten a lot of "just do what you want!" "Make sure you take time to enjoy!" And that's all nice and everything but what's something tangible that you stressed over that didn't really matter? I had one friend say that she was worried about the invite stationary but it doesn't and to just get the cheap stuff.

10 Comments

Latest activity by Norma, on October 19, 2022 at 9:04 PM
  • Bailey
    Expert October 2023
    Bailey ·
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    I second the invite stationary. I made ours ourselves on Templett and printed them on cardstock, they were beautiful and 140 of them cost me around $40 including envelopes and stamps.

    This is more of a vague answer, but the little details. I was hell bent on the EXACT things I wanted, and something even 5% different than what I was imagining was just not going to work. The closer we got, the more I realized it did not matter if [for example] my flowers were rust or terracotta, beige or champagne. They will look just as beautiful and fit the theme, so why was I SO worked up about it?

    I also fought FH on him wearing a jacket with his tux. I really didn't want him to because the wedding is at the beach, and it bothered me for weeks [LOL, looking back on it is funny] when in reality, it's a minute detail.

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  • S
    Super September 2022
    Sarah ·
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    Yes the stationery!! the wording and whether or not to include parents names and what not for no one else to even care and just throw them away.

    The guest list was a big one for me. I was so set on only inviting a certain amount because it's so expensive and about 25% ended up declining anyways and we were way under budget. I kind of wish I just didn't have the arguments with the moms about the guest list and just let them invite whoever they wanted.

    One thing I thought I didn't care about but ended up actually caring about and having the biggest issue with was the tuxes. I wasn't the one wearing them so I didn't give much input. But the day before we had to go buy new shirts because the ones with the rental had the wrong collar and I hated it.

    Basically anything that will be in pictures are what's most important. Because those are what you keep forever.

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  • Shannon
    Expert July 2022
    Shannon ·
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    I spent so much time worrying and thinking of decor.
    I think we watch all of those wedding shows that feature elaborate decorations and centerpieces and it’s not realistic. In the end, we had colorful floral arrangements that were simple and beautiful.
    Guests don’t really care about extravagant decor, they enjoy good food, drinks, and music.
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  • Taylor
    Rockstar October 2022
    Taylor ·
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    I definitely spent extra on stationary that wasn't used in practice the way I anticipated. But don't go crazy on decor. We spent probably $2k on all of our flowers and decor and everyone loved everything. I often wondered if it would be enough and people thought it was great

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  • J
    Just Said Yes September 2022
    Jessica ·
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    Definitely don’t worry about stationary, think about the last invite you received- did you care what it looked like? Also flowers, I received some astronomical quotes. I do have a very talented sister who helped me with my bouquets but would up ordering a beautiful assortment from Costco for $200 (they have a fantastic floral department) and had enough to decorate my house after as well. And I have no idea how my bouquet made it home because as soon as pictures were over I set it down, can you imagine if that were a $500 bouquet?? One thing I did splurge on and would do it again is the guest shuttle. Worth every penny to make sure everyone is ON TIME and gets home safe.
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  • Ashlee
    Rockstar September 2022
    Ashlee ·
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    Stationary is a huge one - we spent hours picking the perfect designs and people just toss them. My husband also wanted these programs that I spent hours creating in canva, had printed at staples, and then had to cut myself and I saw so many discarded on the ground or left on the ceremony chairs. Waste of time and money. But I worried about little details. Like hotel bags, or foam glow sticks, or a hanger with my new last name and none of that mattered. Was it something extra, sure, but I could have saved a lot of money because they wouldn't have been missed without them

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  • Lisa
    Beginner September 2022
    Lisa ·
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    I stress over everything, the invitations was one thing that I stressed over, finally just decided on what I liked. I planned and made everything my self, plus worked 60 to 70 hours a week and took care of my family. I realized who care what everyone else thought of it. This is my wedding and what I want. The day of was so none stop, the guys never wear their suspenders, brooch, or cufflinks. The women never carried their bouquets, I didn’t have my garter on at one point I thought it was disastrous, and the only thing I could do was laugh because it turned out perfect. I made 120 invitations RSV’ed maybe 65 people. And only 32 people showed up for my wedding that was including my bridesmaids groom and flower girl. although we paid for catering for 120 only 32 showed up I was devastated at first, and then realized all the important people was there. Because the most important part of all is that my groom, and myself was happy, and the rest was a relevant and not important. So just take a deep breath and breathe. It’ll work out just fine.
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  • B
    Just Said Yes September 2022
    Brooke ·
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    My husband and I just got married on September 18. We had an out of state destination wedding, so it was a little different to plan that a “normal” wedding.


    We didn’t do table decorations. We had a dinner at a restaurant after the ceremony. They had a tablecloth and candles on the table, and I didn’t add anything! It was something that other people had been asking me what I was going to do, and it started stressing me out that I needed something on the tables for decoration. In the end I decided that wasn’t something I was interested in and it totally didn’t matter.
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  • Michelle
    Super August 2021
    Michelle ·
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    I listened to others and worry shopped for special occasion shoes and jewelry. I ultimately used what I had and felt comfortable being my own vision as a bride. PS, I loved my invites and floral decor, but did not DIY any of it.
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  • N
    Just Said Yes September 2022
    Norma ·
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    I agree with stationary. I also got a template was was able to make our seating chart ourselves. It turned out to be less expensive and they looked professionally done.
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