Plus one’s

Such a tricky one. We kept it to engaged/married couples mainly. For unmarried couples, we gave them the +1 if we hung out with both parties regularly

We really wanted to know everyone at our wedding, not just have random plus ones

Anyone in an established relationship for any amount of time when invitations go out should both be invited by name. Plus ones are for single guests. Arbitrary rules can be difficult because some people get married after knowing each other for 2 months and others have been together for 15 years with no plans to get married. I would be frustrated if I was invited to celebrate someone’s love while ignoring my own, regardless of whether the couple has met my significant other or not.

I gave all of my single guests a plus one. I’ve been in situations where my relationship wasn’t deemed serious enough to warrant a plus one or I didn’t know anyone there. I didn’t like that feeling and didn’t want my friends to feel like I didn’t value them as much.

View Quoted Comment Totally agree with you especially for intimate weddings! And as you mentioned +1 are for the single guests. I think it also makes you think about your relationships with others when you make that guest list! After all, what are we celebrating on that day? It’s not the time to meet your cousin’s girlfriend of two weeks.

I gave everyone a guest. I don’t think anyone should be expected to attend a wedding alone unless they choose. Not everyone brought someone but they had a chance.

I wouldn't do +1 unless you really know the +1. A friend of mine brought her b/f of quite a while to my wedding...he caught the garter and now he's featured in a bunch of my wedding pictures even though they broke up a week later. 🤦‍♀️


I think the rule(s) of married/engaged, committed longterm, or you guys really knowing/liking both people are the way to go.

If we knew the person then yes. We dont want a bunch of random people; either had to be already married, long term significant other.

For most people we are not doing plus ones. Obviously SOs are invited, but we’re not counting them as plus ones, they’re on the invite list. We will be giving plus ones to people traveling alone for the wedding. For example, my uncle will be driving 7 hours for my wedding, he is single but we are giving him a plus one so he doesn’t have to drive alone. We are also giving plus ones to people that we know won’t know anyone at a wedding. So I have friends from school who are not getting a plus one because the entire friend group is also invited so they know a lot of people. I have a different friend who only knows my FH and I and my parents. I would give them a plus one so they don’t have to sit at a table with a bunch of people they don’t know and can enjoy themselves!

View Quoted Comment 100% this. If someone is in a relationship, their s/o should be invited. I would not attend a wedding if I was invited but my FH wasn’t, no matter the reason.


However, we didn’t give a +1 to our single friends. They’re all a part of our every day friend group and we didn’t want random Tinder dates there, which is what it would be. They won’t be lonely without a +1 and they understand.

As PPs said, anyone in a relationship of any kind is a SO and should be invited. Plus ones are for single people. It's not a requirement to give single people the option to bring a plus one (though if it's a destination wedding or if that person doesn't really know anyone at the wedding, it'd be a good idea to give them a plus one).

Additionally, creating arbitrary rules about people's relationships is usually pretty rude. You're judging the seriousness of their relationship based on length of time dating or when/if you met them. If you're inviting a loved one to celebrate your own relationship, it's not okay to disregard or disrespect theirs.

For anyone not in a relationship, we are giving the option to bring a guest. We know our crowd and trust them to make a good decision. It means more to me that someone can bring a guest to a wedding and feel comfortable than if I know the person or not. No one likes going to a wedding by themselves, even if they know other people.

Both members of a couple are invited together by name; the only criterion is that they think of themselves as a couple.

Plus ones are guests of guests and entirely optional.

Have you made your guest list yet? Because I was kind of freaking out about this and then I made my guest list and literally have 4 people who this MIGHT apply to so it really didn't matter too much.

I am not giving single people a random +1.

I am inviting my cousins girlfriend of 6 months BY NAME. If they break up, he comes alone.

That's basically how I'm handling it.

View Quoted Comment Exactly this .

I agree with PPs. Anyone in a relationship needs to be invited with their significant other. A good way to look at it is this: why should they celebrate your relationship if you don't seem to respect theirs?

View Quoted Comment Yes thank you. We made our guest list and realized this applies to two friends who live out of state so of course we will give them a plus one. Turns out this isn’t an issue after all and pretty much all our family and friends are engaged/married/ or in our friend group. Was just curious what others do since I have been to weddings where there were rules on +1s.

View Quoted Comment

Glad it worked out!

We invited everyone with a plus one. Those that are important to our loved ones are people we want to meet. It's the easiest rule ever.