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Gina
Beginner May 2022

Plus ones + Destination Wedding

Gina, on April 19, 2021 at 3:35 PM Posted in Etiquette and Advice 0 12
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Hello all!


I am planning a “destination wedding” for 2022. I use quotes because it is half destination as the grooms family lives in Mexico. We are renting out a private villa for the wedding party to stay no charge as well as for the venue. I can obviously only hold a certain amount of people to stay and 120 guests for the event itself.
I’m already at 160 people on my guest list without giving plus ones to people who aren’t engaged or married.
So my question is, is it rude of me not to give plus ones to my wedding party if they aren’t engaged? My MOH is furious she may not potentially be able to bring her boyfriend (of one year). Meanwhile we are already cutting out grooms family members that live in Mexico and it would also mess up who can stay at the villa for free.
Thoughts?

12 Comments

Latest activity by Catherine, on April 22, 2021 at 2:21 AM
  • KYLIE
    Expert May 2019
    KYLIE Online ·
    • Flag
    Yes—that would be super rude. Your MOH has every right to be furious, and so would your other bridal party members if you don’t give them plus ones.
    • Reply
  • Hannah
    Rockstar July 2019
    Hannah ·
    • Flag
    Yes, it is rude. Anyone in a relationship should have their significant other invited, by name. This is especially since when they have to travel. You don't need to house everyone in the same villa. Allow people to make their own arrangements, but not inviting their significant other is basically saying you don't value their relationship as important enough because there isn't a ring.
    • Reply
  • Shelly
    Rockstar January 2022
    Shelly ·
    • Flag

    You may need to consider finding a different venue if it will only hold 120, and your guest list is already at 160, or just be fine with the idea that some people will have to find other accommodations.

    The wedding party members should def. be abled to bring plus ones, regardless of relationship length, so I understand her frustration.

    • Reply
  • Stacey
    Super May 2021
    Stacey ·
    • Flag

    Yes, it's very poor etiquette and your MOH of all people has every right to feel upset. A relationship of one year is not a Plus One - that is couple.

    • Reply
  • L
    Lady ·
    • Flag

    It's super rude, You need to invite anyone with a significant other (even if they aren't engaged or married). Plus ones are only for guests who are actually single and are never required. Also, if your venue can only hold 120 it is a HUGE mistake to invite 160.

    • Reply
  • Gina
    Beginner May 2022
    Gina ·
    • Flag
    Thanks everybody. Wasn’t sure if it was worse to not invite family members that live locally since it would be one or the other at this point
    • Reply
  • Gina
    Beginner May 2022
    Gina ·
    • Flag
    View Quoted Comment
    Even if it’s a destination wedding? I was told to expect a majority to not come
    • Reply
  • Gina
    Beginner May 2022
    Gina ·
    • Flag
    View Quoted Comment
    Everyone else actually are super ok with it
    • Reply
  • mrswinteriscoming
    Rockstar December 2021
    mrswinteriscoming ·
    • Flag

    This wedding is a year away, by which point, providing all goes well, your MOH will have been with her partner for 2 years. By that point in time, if she is not granted a plus one for her partner purely because they're not engaged, it'll be a big slap in the face.

    • Reply
  • Kimberly
    Super March 2021
    Kimberly ·
    • Flag
    I’m not understanding why FH’s local family is the ones to be cut to include your friends’ SOs who should absolutely be invited. It sounds like some of your list may need to be cut down to accommodate more people on your list.
    To answer your question though, yes MOH’s and any other significant others should always be invited by name. They are not plus ones, they are part of a couple unit.
    • Reply
  • L
    Lady ·
    • Flag
    View Quoted Comment

    Yes. What would you do if everyone said yes? That definitely happens

    • Reply
  • Catherine
    Devoted March 2023
    Catherine ·
    • Flag
    Your MOH’s boyfriend isn’t a plus one. He’s a significant other and needs to be invited. And over inviting past what the venue can hold is never a smart idea. If you get a 100% RSVP rate then you’re 40 people over your limit
    • Reply

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