Plus one vs significant other

Our thoughts on this are that we want all of our guests to feel comfortable and have a great time at our wedding. So, all significant others will be invited, regardless of relationship length or title (because who the heck am I to judge whether someone else’s relationship is “serious”?!); and all single guests have the option to invite a plus one.

For us we included significant others where at least for a few months before invitations went out, the couple had been seeing each other - while I didn't want to exclude anyone on the basis of undermining their relationship, we wanted to make sure we were inviting the significant others of our friends and not just someone they were casually dating (we didn't have the budget to allow +1s other than significant others)

Since we've been engaged for 2.5 years, many couples from our original list have broken up and others have started new relationships. So we've definitely had to figure this out.


We're not giving random plus ones to completely single people. Most of the single guests are my fiancé's cousins or my friends who were invited as a group, so they will all know other people there; it won't be awkward for them to come alone. As for dating couples, we've met some of them and are inviting those. There are a few more that we didn't know about, but my MIL told us, "So-and-so has a serious boyfriend so please add him." We just sent invites out, so I think at this point, everyone in an established relationship is having their partner invited by name.

About 80% of our guests are married. Of the total guest count, 90% will be traveling from out of state to attend our event(s). I am adding a plus one to the few in that percentile that are single/divorced as I feel that will help defray some of their costs. (many can share the cost of the hotel and rental car) PLUS, as I have mentioned in other posts, we have a lot of friends, but THEY don't know each other, so it will be a small group of 5, another group of 6, and so on. I just felt adding the plus ones to the singles will help with their comfort zone.

View Quoted Comment We are doing the same.

I gave everyone a plus one, single or not, just because I wanted people to be comfortable and have fun. BUT our wedding list is small and we have the budget for it.

Everyone who defined themselves as in a relationship was invited with their partner by name. There were a small handful of truly single guests, and they all got plus ones. Only one person used her plus one, and she brought her sister. I feel like it isn't my place to judge the worthiness of someone's relationship. Some couples get serious very quickly. Honestly, my husband and I both knew we were going to marry each other after about 3 months of dating (although it didn't actually happen for another 6 years 🙈).

We're inviting all significant others, no matter the length of the relationship or whether we've met them or not. We're also allowing plus ones for anyone who is single and are kind of expecting that a few of our guests will be bringing friends instead of a romantic partner. Like Cece said, we want everyone to feel comfortable and can afford the extra people so why not?

We only had a handful of single friends and offered all a plus 1. Only 2 took up that offer, and their dance partners added to the party. We did exclude children based on budget and personal preferences as our friends and fam have 33 kids (almost 1/3 our final group), so not that type of community event.

All family members of appropriate age got a plus one. None of them have long term SOs so we make it just a plus one. My friends who are friends with each other but their husbands don’t hang out with us didn’t get a plus one. Mostly because one of them is single and the other two aren’t and I want the single one to be able to hang out with the other ones.
Other than that they got plus ones if they’re married or living with the person.

We will give everyone a plus one, although not that many will probably bring one if they aren’t in a relationship. I think literal “no ring no bring” is kind of rude, especially if someone is in a serious relationship but just isn’t engaged or married yet. I attended all four weddings my fiancé was invited to last year, even though he had been invited before Covid (I believe) alone before we started dating. By the first wedding we’d been together for a year, so he just asked his friends if it was ok to bring me, and alas it was. Anyway, I can see if you are really tight on capacity you do have to be more careful of limiting plus ones … but I think it’s a nicer gesture to make your guests enjoy the evening if they can bring their significant other or just a friend. Also a know your crowd type of thing.

Our wedding is small and intimate, so we're only inviting significant others if they've been together for a while (which has essentially become engaged or almost engaged couples) and we know the significant other well (and sticking to that set of rules has allowed us to avoid significant others we don't really care for). This group is our closest friends and our immediate family only, so we don't really want to be getting to know someone at the wedding or dealing with someone we don't really like. All the friends know each other as well, so no one will be standing off to the side awkwardly because they didn't get to bring a date.

We're allowing a plus one for our single friends, and we're budgeting for it. We want people to feel comfortable and have a good time, and I think going to a wedding alone as an adult is kind of awkward (unless it's family and you know everyone). Also, I remember when my FH and I first started dating, I was his plus one to about 3 different weddings within our first year together. We had a wonderful time at all of them, and I remember thinking it was a nice gesture for his friends to allow him a plus one, even though they didn't really know me at the time.

We are allowing everyone to bring a plus one, relationship or not. One of my friends asked if she could bring her best friend. I didn’t have a problem with it, we accounted for everyone having a plus one.

I'm giving everyone either a plus one or inviting their plus one. I trust them enough to decide whether or not to bring their partner, regardless of how long they've been together.