Plus One Etiquette

I think if they know a group well you'd be fine just seating them all together (i.e. a friend circle). Especially if you don't have a huge wedding. If you had like 300+ people, I'd say everyone better get someone they can latch on to all evening because otherwise it's like attending a convention by yourself

This is just my opinion....if you don't want to let everyone bring a plus one, but want to keep it fair and consistent, you could say if you're married or engaged, you can bring SO. If not, no plus 1. You can't really tell some people they can bring a friend but not others so that seems a way to keep it fair

We didn't extend plus ones to single guests. (We're paying about $150 per person, before alcohol, so likely upwards of $200) Our wedding isn't date night.

Every guest who is in a relationship should have their significant other invited by name. This is not a plus one

Plus ones are for truly single guests. You can extend plus ones to everyone, or to no one - but pick a rule and be consistent! I always think it's courteous to extend a plus one to all of your bridal party members, and it's nice to extend a plus one to guests who may not know anyone else!

https://www.weddingwire.com/wedding-ideas/recently-engaged/wedding-guest-list-etiquette

We did not give a plus one for every single guest. We took their personal circumstance into consideration when making the decision

This is who we gave plus ones

- single members of wedding party

- signal out of town guest

- single guest who wouldn't know anyone else at the wedding

Also, if you are concerned about head count do NOT do Save the Dates. Yes, everyone likes the thought of their engagement picture on someone's frig, but DO.NOT.DO.IT. You are then committed to inviting everyone who gets an STD. Write a very nice letter to grandparents, email parents, siblings. Wait several months from now before deciding wedding party, then after discussing with them, email them time and date.

@Sheryl that is horrible advice. A live-in significant other is not a "friend." As @OGA said, anyone in a romantic relationship gets their SO invited BY NAME. If you have the space to include plus ones for truly single guests, that is great. If not, it's okay too.

Don't have the right to determine if someone's relationship is considered "serious" (even off/on relationships) or not so invited everyone with plus ones. But we do have the space for it, so that isn't an issue.

This is what WW said on the link that WWLYne posted

have a lot of single friends. Do I have to invite them all with dates?

Ah, the plus-one debate! You should invite guests who are in long-term, committed relationships with their significant others. But for friends who are casually dating or single, you don’t have to invite them with plus-ones – again, as long as you’re consistent. Of course, those who are living together, engaged, or married should be invited as couples – even if you have yet to meet the significant other.

@karen STDs should only be sent to those who are invited. I have no idea why you wouldnt send save the dates.

I sent out STDs for my DW because it's far too early to send invites and expect RSVPs. We only sent them to people who are on the guest list for our wedding in November.

If I'm calling someone my significant other, then I'm pretty sure I'm in a committed relationship. But nice try with your shitty advice Karen.

OP, plus ones are for truly single guests. Anyone with a significant other should have their name also on the invite.

I think @Karen's first point was that sending STDs locks you into a guest list, so be careful if you think you will have to cut down your guest list before the wedding.

Valid point.

@Beachy what Karen is saying is don't send STDs because then you are locked into absolutely inviting those people. People change their mind for various reason by the time invites actually go out (budget, no longer friends, etc.)

Beachy, if you are having a destination wedding go ahead, but like every other wedding, realize that you are committing yourself to sending out invites to whomever gets a STD. So if you send some STDs to co-workers, but you or they change jobs, you still have to send invite. Now, with a DW, you may not get so many people coming, but for local weddings, people may still come. And now you might have preferred to invite different people if you are trying to keep headcount down, but you are committed to inviting the people you sent STDs to.

FB99. I would hope I do not have any friends who would move in with someone after one week, but I would consider the 3 year people long term.

I've said this a thousand times on this forum, but you do not get to judge someone else's relationship while simultaneously asking them to come and support yours.

I agree with Karen on the STD's. Skip them. Everything else, nope. Karen doesn't get to decide the validity of someone's relationship.

I think consistency is key in this situation. For example, I just recently got invited to a wedding by a coworker with no plus one and I'm engaged (obviously). None of the other coworkers invited got plus ones either, even if they are married. Had some of my coworkers gotten to bring their SO and I didn't, I probably would have been a little annoyed.

So, as others suggested, come up with some kind of rule and stick to it. That way, no one can really question your decision or get upset if they didn't get to bring someone.

@fb99 Really? I didn't get offended by it. Maybe I'm just too easy going, I should stop answering these forums haha.

Catlady, the link regarding plus ones was from WW. Really doubt is was published in 1975.

https://www.weddingwire.com/wedding-ideas/recently-engaged/wedding-guest-list-etiquette

I agree with Stephanie on this one. Come up with a rule that applies to everyone, so no one will feel left out or have the chance to compare what the other guests got to do.