Piggyback wedding celebration

I know you only get one day, and when a bride is upset that a family member is getting married weeks before or after her, I think that's a little silly. However, there's a distinct difference here. You are having a destination wedding, and the format is not the same as an at home wedding. They're typically a few days filled with prewedding festiviies leading up to the wedding. Since you've gone to all the trouble of sourcing the destination, I think it is an opportunitistic move for another couple to say, "Hey, since everyone is already here for the wedding that you've been planning for months, we're having a wedding reception too!". You and FH should be the honored couple from the time people arrive until they leave. What this woman and her mother are doing is using your guest list and destination for their event. They were invited as guests, and that's what they should be. I'm also wondering what type of event they're planning. Will they be flitting around preparing for their event instead of being focused on your wedding? Are they sending invitations or announcements? Yeah, this would seriously irritate me.

The bottom line is that this woman made a decision to elope this weekend. That's fine, but you don't use somebody else's destination wedding to host your own reception six months after you're married. Beyond that, are they expecting gifts from the guests? I think it's an imposition to ask guests to buy gifts for two couples when they've already absorbed the costs of travel, lodging, etc.

It's flat out rude.

This is so incredibly rude. I understand their logic, but I would have run it by you before actually planning it. I would not be happy.

ETA: This has nothing to do with pride. It is basic consideration.

Wait. They elope in September and wait until the weekend of your DW to decide to have a reception? Audaciously rude!

Centerpiece Flowers said it perfectly. This is incredibly inappropriate and rude. You might want to talk to the couple and let them know how you feel - they might realize they're in the wrong and change it to another weekend.

Totally rude and I'd be very pissy about it. Its completely ridiculous of them to use your DW to throw their own celebration. F that!

I would not allow it to happen; no discussion, no bartering. Start out polite, but if they don't back down, uninvited them.

Thanks everyone for your comments and feedback. Makes me feel not completely crazy for being upset. At the end of the day I just want to get married but have been very shocked how certain people can act during the wedding planning process. I especially love your comment @Centerpiece Flowers. Thank you!!

That's strange to celebrate their wedding 5 months later. I can see a week or 2 later but not 5 months.

Let us know how this turns out! I'm pissed off for you! I hope you talk to them and tell them they need a change of plans... Non negotiable!!!

Out of curiosity, OP, if they had come to you before announcing this and said that they'd like to do it at the same time, do you think you would have found a way to coordinate that? (I'm thinking well it could save money, help ease travel costs, etc as positives aside from the obvious negatives)