People think they are invited..

I wouldn't go out of my way to tell them they're not invited. I would wait until RSVP's come in and if there are extras added on, just call them and explain that the only people invited were those whose names were on the invitaiton!

This happens a lot during wedding planning. Everybody wants to celebrate with you and you just have to be polite but firm. "Thank you so much for wanting to share our day with us! Due to budget/space/whatever you want concerns, we had to limit our guest list. We would love to spend some time with you after our day!" That's what I said to some folks. It's awkward, but unless you're in a financial place to accommodate the extra guests, you'll have to do it.

Ugh that's my fear to have to call and explain that to them. I don't want to say anything but shoot I guess I hope they catch on with a formal invite.

This is why I don't like STD. Did the STD envelope have the NAMES of those who will be invited? I guess that would be were the "oops" came in. If they did, then you did nothing wrong.

Do NOT B list as suggested above. Invite who you intended to invite and to those who you sent the STD to. If others are assuming they were invited w/o receive a STD they are being rude.

Basically no one can afford to invite everyone they want. We got a lot of crap from our church group about not inviting any of them, but whatever. People don't realize when they are overstepping boundaries sometimes.

If anyone says anything directly to YOU just express that you would love to be able to celebrate with everyone, but your venue/budget won't allow that. If they don't say anything to YOU then they will find out when they don't get invited.

Yeah I absolutely addressed to each individual not like "the Johnson family" it was either a single persons name or it was "Dan and Jill Johnson".. I feel bad for excluding some of these people but they do not speak to us and I'm trying to keep it to the parents friends/ family along with our friends.

When you do invites make sure you include "We have __ seats reserved in your honor."

Britny yes that's how they are being made !

Yeah, you did it correctly then

Sadly people just don't think before they speak. They will figure it out when they don't get an invitation, but yes include the seats in your honor on the RSVP and if anyone addresses you directly let them know.

Ugh how embarrassing. Haha but thanks for the info I will surely do that! I was just making sure I didn't miss anything here! Lol

Yeah, you did everything right. Just explain if they don't catch on after formal invites. Sorry!

One of my former coworkers from a job I left a year ago emailed me (copying the other coworkers-small office of 5) a few months after I got engaged saying "here's all of our addresses since you're going to need them soon". When I left the job, we were all close and I totally expected to invite them whenever I got married (we weren't even engaged yet), but then life happened and none of us have spoken in a year, except for one or 2 times when I've sent them messages. I was shocked. Luckily there's little chance of me running into any of them, so I just didn't answer and let that be my answer, but it's amazing how forward/rude people can be about wedding invites!

I don't understand what it is about weddings that instantly makes people think you and them are best friends, but it happens. I had married people expect an invite to my wedding that I never even got invited to theirs. And I'm not saying that was a criteria for who I invited to my wedding, but I can see at least expecting a reciprocated invite if I was invited to theirs. It's whatever. I didn't do STD's since I didn't have a lot of out of town guests, I did make sure the ones who were did know ahead of time by contacting them. I kept my wedding date as quiet as I could becuase of that reason. You're on the right track they might have hurt feelings but if you don't know them then there's no reason for it, and they're grown adults, they should get over it.

People are so rude. I have had a few people ask me straight out if they were invited. Unfortunately we could not accommodate everyone. DH has 80 plus first cousins on his fathers side alone! His dad was 1 of 16 kids. He barely knows most of his first cousins. It's just insane to me when people invite themselves. You didn't do anything wrong just make sure you do the ___ seats reserved in your honor on your RSVPs.

Haha well glad to know it's their lack of manners rather than mine!