People rant

Nice thought, but there are people who are truly oblivious to good etiquette. If they post they are planning or doing something, then that is open for comments. Almost every day, there is a thread in which the OP ends up thanking people for preventing them from making a grave breach of etiquette- they truly had no idea that what they were planning/doing was rude.

The internet is just like any other conversation. If you say something, you have to be prepared to receive feedback. You don't have to agree with it. You don't have to follow it. But you needn't get all defensive from feedback from internet strangers.

Agreed. Frankly, I think I generally understand basic etiquette rules, but I am happy for everything that I have learned from this forum that I may not otherwise have known was important, offensive, etc.

If, along the way of planning my wedding I decide to do something that I don’t want peoples’ honest comments about . . . I just won’t post on a public forum about it.

This is an etiquette and advice forum, not a place to find cheerleaders who will tell you all of your ideas are fantastic. If something goes against etiquette or is generally in poor taste, it will be called out here. That's why people come to this site, for advice.

I would much rather have some random stranger on the internet tell me "Hey, having a dollar dance if it isn't part of your cultural norm is not OK" than move forward with a dollar dance because I didn't know better and make myself look bad in front of my nearest and dearest.

Aaaaand at the end of the day, it's the internet. Many of the people asking for advice here are 100% clear that they're going to do what they're going to do regardless of the advice they get, so if you want to have a cash bar after people here have said it's tacky and reflects poorly on you as a host/ess, you do you.

View Quoted Comment The dollar dance is part of my culture, but I haven't seen that in ages. I didn't think people still did that.

From what I understood, OP is trying to say that people give opinions on something that wasn't asked. For example someone asking "would look better for the groomsmen to wear a peach shirt and ivory tie with their navy blue suit or white shirt and peach tie with their navy suit" and someone comments on how they shouldn't be wearing navy blue because she's having a summer wedding. Or they comment how peach is so overdone.

But...but...that's what this forum is here for. (?) If you don't want people to tell you (really they aren't commanding you, they're offering advice...) how to do your wedding then maybe don't post? What was it that made you post this? If you are offended by a remark or comment then I would suggest keep it to yourself, I don't mean this to sound rude but this whole forum is a network of ideas and comments and help. If you are offended that someone said a cash bar is tacky then you will be offended by the inner thoughts of many of your guests because at the end of the day a cash bar IS quite tacky but you know what? If you can't afford it then you can't afford it and people will deal, it's not life or death. Typically, though, people want to let loose and have fun at weddings. If they are traveling and spending money to support you, then they probably at least expect a drink or two on the house. It's pretty normal. Good luck!

Just walk away. Every time one of these posts come up the OP gets mobbed.

I just think most brides know their guests better than the people on here that pass judgement. To call people rude for the decisions they make for their wedding, is rude!!

View Quoted Comment I think etiquette and taste concerns can be brought up gently and still be effective. Sometimes this forum is harsh on people’s DIY decorations or choice to be non-traditional/economize. I think it helps to make “I” statements such as “From my perspective, I would not do this due to X reason” this prevents some hurt feeling while still respectfully expressing one’s views.

I agree! I have replied to peoples posts when they were asking for advice and people would reply back to me being very nasty about the advice I gave. This is supposed to be a place where we all help other, not judge or be nasty. This is a very happy time for all of us. So if you got nothing nice to say, don't say anything. People want advice but in a nice way, so please everyone just be nice and enjoy the planning process!