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Devoted January 2021

People insisting we’ll have regrets

gratia01, on May 3, 2020 at 6:22 AM Posted in Family and Relationships 0 11

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My fiancé and I have decided to have a small wedding ceremony and no party afterward. At the most, we will have a cake and punch reception to give us the chance to say hi to people afterward. Both of us are on board with having an intimate, quiet day. Unfortunately, our family and friends don’t like this. They’re insisting that we’ll regret not having a “WEDDING-wedding” and it won’t be special enough. They keep saying how it’s such an important day and we need to celebrate and all that, and it’s really frustrating me. How do I explain that this is what I want and I’m not going to be disappointed?

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11 Comments

Latest activity by Nefetera, on May 4, 2020 at 2:57 AM

Master May 2019
Cyndy · on May 3, 2020 at 7:16 AM
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If you and your FH are in agreement I wouldn’t worry about what others want or think. Just stick to what you want. Lots of people don’t want a big wedding and others shouldn’t pressure them so just don’t give in. Good luck
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VIP October 2020
Samantha · on May 3, 2020 at 10:11 AM
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It’s sweet that they care, but it’s not really anybody else’s business how you celebrate this milestone. You’ve decided what’s appropriate for your wedding and people don’t have to agree but they do need to respect that. If they can’t do that, then just stop discussing your wedding plans with them.
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Devoted July 2021
Lindsay · on May 3, 2020 at 11:11 AM
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It’s your decision at the end of the day and your wallet not theirs as I’m sure they care very much and wanted to celebrate with you it’s about you and your fiancé and what makes you guys happy!
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Super November 2019
Mrs. S · on May 3, 2020 at 11:43 AM
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People also told me I’d regret not going to prom. It’s been 12 years and I haven’t missed it yet lol. Just tell them we’re really happy with our decision and ignore any other comments about it. It’s not their business.
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Legend June 2019
Melle · on May 3, 2020 at 1:58 PM
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I think what you’re doing already sounds good considering you’re having a cake and punch after to socialize with everyone. Some people just feel like a giant celebration is more memorable but that’s also assuming that everyone will feel the same. You do you
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Super January 2021
Sharonda · on May 3, 2020 at 4:13 PM
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You don’t owe anyone an explanation for doing what is best for you and your significant other. If anything, I’d tell people “we’ll have to agree to disagree” and keep it moving. Best of luck to you —- and be sure to enjoy your day just the way you want it!
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VIP January 2020
Vicky · on May 3, 2020 at 4:19 PM
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It's your choice whether or not to have a party with all of the bells and whistles, but you do need to host something for the people who attend your ceremony as a thank you. Cake and punch is just fine as long as it's not during a meal time.
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Master May 2020
Kari · on May 3, 2020 at 4:56 PM
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You don't have to explain yourself to anyone. If you and your partner want a small ceremony, then do it! No one else gets to tell you how to wedding (except for the laws and possibly your religion).

There are people who have big weddings and love every minute of it, and can't imagine doing anything else, so there will of course be people who think weddings have to be a big affair, but it's really what you want to do to celebrate your love for one another.
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Expert October 2020
Kimberly · on May 3, 2020 at 10:28 PM
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This cake and punch after a wedding was the wedding norm back in my grandparents day, so it isn’t unusual nor any less a “wedding-wedding.” If this is what you both want then the others can mind their own business.
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Legend March 2017
Pirate & 60s Bride · on May 4, 2020 at 12:17 AM
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From what I’ve seen here, couples usually regret having the wedding someone ELSE wanted (usually family). “We did everything my parents wanted and loved it,” said no bride ever. 😉

Follow your heart and stick to what you & your partner want.
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VIP March 2015
Nefetera · on May 4, 2020 at 2:57 AM
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Hello
You let them know at this time this is a hard desirable for you and your finace to do and this is what works best. If you both know you wont have jo regrets then you guys are all set
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