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Megan
Savvy July 2019

Pay for Day-after Brunch?

Megan, on May 20, 2019 at 7:03 PM Posted in Parties and Events 0 14
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We invited our family to join us for brunch the day after the wedding. We asked the restaurant if they would do separate checks and they said they would. But is it rude to invite the family and then ask them to pay for themselves? Should we just foot the bill? If not, how do we say it respectfully?

14 Comments

Latest activity by Megan, on May 21, 2019 at 4:13 PM
  • Expert May 2021
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    If you invited them to a brunch for the day after you’re wedding I think it’s polite to pay. Some might even assume you’re footing the bill since you’ve arranged a brunch and invited guests.
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  • Katie M.
    Devoted June 2019
    Katie M. ·
    • Flag
    My fiancé and I put in our invitations we invite you to join us for brunch at your own expense. This way they knew they had to pay but we wanted them there 😊
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  • Megan
    Savvy July 2019
    Megan ·
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    That's fair. I honestly should've thought about it in the first place. It would probably be nice as a "thanks for everything" gesture. Thanks!

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  • Megan
    Savvy July 2019
    Megan ·
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    Oooh smart, that's a nice way of putting it

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  • earias
    Champion December 2017
    earias ·
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    You should pay. It is rude to have a formal invitation to brunch and then expect them to pay. Alternatively, if you had just waited to spread by word of mouth that you and your FH are having brunch at xyz place and anyone is welcome to drop by - then this is not a formal invitation and the expectation of you paying is not there. But once you put it in your invitation or give a formal invitation to the brunch, even via your website, the expectation is that you will pay.

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  • Expert May 2021
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    That was a smart way to word it. Megan, maybe you’ll get lucky and one of your parents will offer to take care of the tab.
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  • Kelly
    VIP October 2020
    Kelly ·
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    Because it's a formal invitation, or seems to be, most people are going to assume it's footed by you.
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  • Megan
    Savvy July 2019
    Megan ·
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    Yeah, it was a Paperless Post. And I realized too late that the way the website has it is "Hosted by " me and my fiancé. So I am definitely leaning towards paying - since it definitely appears as a formal invite.

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  • Kelly
    VIP October 2020
    Kelly ·
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    Oof. Yea unfortunately if anything says hosted by it's pretty clearly footed by you two. Good luck.
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  • Megan
    Savvy July 2019
    Megan ·
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    Oh yeah, def don't want to come off as rude to the family

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  • Bridget
    VIP August 2019
    Bridget ·
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    If you invited them to a brunch they are probably expecting you to foot the bill. If you do plan on having them pay I would go back and talk to each person making it very clear that they are the ones responsible for their bill.
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  • Megan
    Savvy July 2019
    Megan ·
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    Thanks all, this is all very good advice. I feel confident I should expect to pay and hope for the possibility of help but not rely on it. Again, it's probably something we should do for them anyway. They have done so much for us!

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  • MrsD
    Legend July 2019
    MrsD ·
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    If you specifically invite them, I'd pay unless everyone 100% knows they are paying for themselves. If I was invited to brunch, I'd probably expect it to be hosted. We put something on our website that more said "the bride & groom will eat breakfast at the hotel around 9AM if you happen to be in the hotel" or something like that, since we aren't paying.

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  • Megan
    Savvy July 2019
    Megan ·
    • Flag

    That is a really smart way to put it, that way it's on them if they want to be there to see you or not. Kudos for planning to wake up so early the next day! I set it all at 11, in fear I will be the crypt keeper when I wake up!

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